Thursday, 9 August 2007

The letter... (AKA "My Mum's Side Of The Story")

Current mood:  confused

During the night after our Somerset trip (when I supposedly tossed Mum out of bed, by daring to mention that I wanted my own bed), Mum told me that she came downstairs and wrote a letter to my Great Uncle John and his wife - the ones who say I'm "childish" to collect "bl**dy ugly" ponies (and this was when I was eleven!) - and it has been waiting in the kitchen to be posted.
Today however, Mum decided she'd written it in a moment of madness, and that she'd have to re-write it, since she'd "said too much".
She tucked the old one underneath an old bread bag in the rubbish bin, obviously determined that I shouldn't see what  she had written, but I guessed her true feelings about me would be in that letter, and so I  snooped anyway, desperate to know what I was up against.
Below you will find the lines she wrote.  There was also a lot of other stuff saying how wonderful my Dad and my sister were, and goodness knows what else, but I've edited those out for her privacy.  It's just me she's slagging off.  Notice the way she's trying to make out we have a normal family life (see my notes in bold).
Dear Madeline and John,
..............Desiree causes me a lot of worry too - (following her saying how "poor" Dad is working himself to an early grave - yeah, by spending hours at the office printing unsavoury websites!) she's had a complete character change and is very stroppy - often reducing me to tears. (Huh?  I thought that was my evil father!) I know she's miserable about her teeth, but there's really no excuse for her behaviour of late.  I'm hoping it's a teenage "phase" but can't stand much more of being told she hates me (I've never told her I hate her, only that I wish she understood me!) + wants to leave home! (Do you blame me after all of the over-protectiveness?) She's got worse since she's had the computer & got involved with these awful "chat rooms" (I NEVER use chat rooms, the MLP message boards and MSN messenger are the nearest thing.  Teenage chat rooms full of "lol", "r" for are, "u" for you, and "4" for, well, for (!) drive me crazy!)  She taps away to most unsavoury people (Well, you know who you are, people!  I certainly don't!) who wind her up - andwehave some awful rows when I try to stop her going up London to meet complete strangers.  (Well, unless she means Pony Meets, I can't imagine what she's talking about.  Most of the people at those she and I HAVE met before though, so they're not "complete strangers", and anyhow she's never had an awful row with me over any of those.  Once she says she won't come with me, I don't even bother to ask about going on my own any more. ) She no longer wants to go anywhere with me & that's for sure! (I never said that! Only that I wished I could go out independantly and with other people too!  For crying out loud, I'm SIXTEEN!!!  Expect me to want my own life too!) We had a coach outing to Great Yarmouth last week & she sulked all day because she'd sooner have stayed at home.  (WTH?  You read my blog last week, it wasn't a brilliant day, but I enjoyed it!  I never complained once.  It was Mum who dragged around moaning after the seal boat trip didn't take place!)
Thanks for the offer of looking after Piggy (Splodge) by the way (They offered to have him in their back garden.  After he's lived indoors for five years, I don't think he'd take to that too well somehow - especially in an area full of foxes!) - but I don't think Desiree actually wants to go away - especially not with us - at the moment! 
David had a rare lull in work ( nice for him. *Vomit sounds*), so he took me for a belated birthday treat - we had one night away (one night beingthe most we could leave Piggy on his own) and Desiree absolutely ruined it by sulking and refusing to take an interest in anything. (WTH?  Again, you read my blog post.  I was interested, just miserable over my teeth!)  It got so bad that we had to come home early - me in tears (Oh, *sob, sob*, really.  Mother dearest, you don't half exaggerate!  It was an argument over a sandwich, for crying out loud!) - and as soon as we got back she made a beeline for that wretched computer again.  (You want to stop me talking to people on here now too, don't you?  I need some communication with the outside world, you know?)
I'm upset that I've obviously upset her so badly.  What on Earth have I done wrong?  I've obeyed all the weird rules.  *Cries*  Then she's sad when I sayI want to leave home.  This letter is now going in the bin.  It's no use to me, and I'll be murdered for sure if she finds it.  I just wanted to let someone know her words on this whole blasted existance story of mine.  *Sighs*
Thanks for reading - now I'm going to go and sleep in the "communal bed" with the woman who wrote that about me.  Remembers: Must.  Not.  Complain.  God, someone help me!
Best wishes,

Desiree Skylark   xxx

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