Saturday, 29 August 2009

"I'm feeling spinny again!"

Current mood:  weird

To quote Tabitha St.Germain as my favourite little mint pony in 'The World's Biggest Tea Party'.  I really am feeling spinny though, as well as getting nervy shivers down my spine, being freezing cold, and having an awful headache; I'm sure it's caused by depression, but not sure what I can do to snap out of it, when I still have no independence.

Anyways, I figured it was best to set my mind to something other than the arguments around me, so I'll continue with my blog...although David has the TV turned up ever so loud right next to my ear again, so I'm not sure how well composed this will be.

August 25th 2009
I have a pad full of hints and notes to remind me of everything I need to write in my blog, but it's been so long that I can't even remember what the notes are reminding me about!  Or perhaps I'm just addled.  The top note is that 'Loud TV stopped me writing my blog again' which is rather amusing, considering I'm writing one right now with Star Trek booming in my ear!

I did promise Mum that I'd ask on my blog about a vase which held flower decorations at her parents' wedding.  We uncovered it in a shoe box full of straw while clearing out the house.  The straw was full of carpet beetles, but the vase is unharmed by the insects as far as we can tell.  However, it is being eaten by what appears to be a type of brown mold.  The vase is made of what I can only describe as a chalky material.  When we saw the brown marks, Mum attempted to rub the 'dirt' off, but as she scraped at it, she realised that the vase was rubbing away with it, and soon a hole had formed in the side.

Does anyone know what could be causing this, or if there's any way to stop (or at least delay) it eating what remains of the vase?  Photos can be seen below:
Images deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!
Thank you!

Mum and I are not finding any of our missing belongings as we pentrate further into the front bedroom, just more and more of David's junk.  We found a whole box full of old VHS tapes, all neatly packed and labelled up - music videos from the 90s on top, and rather worst things beneath.  "The World's Smallest Mini Skirt" and some, ahem, women who were not even wearing that much.  Needless to say, those tapes are now in the local landfill.  David has quite enough of this stuff, and he'll never notice that those are missing...and I don't see why he should get to keep all these tapes he spent hours recording when he'd promised he was clearing up to give me a bedroom, and spent tons of money on when he promised Mum holidays and me various classes and lessons.

We went to Woodberry in the evening to finish assembling my bed.  Well, almost.  We still can't figure out the drawers, and David isn't even willing to try again.
Speaking of the drawers, after pushing the bed back against the wall, we made a dreadful discovery.  Thanks to Sickton, and his insisting on putting a large radiator in my room, despite the fact I'm always too hot and quite literally never want central heating anyway (I even sleep under open windows in winter by choice!), two of my four drawers will not open very wide at all.
David says all is well though, as I can "decide what I want to put in the drawers, and how often do you actually want to get into drawers anyway?!"  Um, excuse me?  I intend on turning over a new leaf and not keeping anything that I don't really want.  Hence, my drawers will be filled with things I will need regular access to...and that bed is way too heavy to move every day.  So the drawers will most likely never be used.  What a dreadful waste of space!

August 26th 2009
I went in the library, and dug out a big plastic box of my old Pokémon toys.  I forgot I had so many!  They bring back a lot of memories, but I've decided to part with them anyways.  The Gameboy games are the only Pokémon items I really still want.  The only problem is, I'm not sure what to charge for them.  I know Pokémon toys are yet another thing that have lost their value over the last few years, but I'd still be interested to know if there's any point trying to find new homes for mine that way, rather than donating them straight to a charity shop.  I seem to have a lot of 'rolling' ones on ball bearings which have to knock down card targets, a couple of 'special' moving ones (an Ivysaur with 'real' razor leaf attack, and a Charmeleon that opens and closes his mouth), some Tyco figurines in Pokéballs and some of the more traditional anime models - Ash, Misty, Jessie and James.  I've got quite a few others, too, but those are the ones I remember off the top of my head.

Further clearing up in the front bedroom allowed us to finally reach another cupboard, which we discovered was full of old clothes, both from Mum's old wardrobe and unsold jumble.  She gave me a pretty blue skirt with an elasticated waist which fits really nicely (there was a black one too, but the waistband had stretched and cracked), so now I'm more determined than ever to get my stupid legs into a state where they can come out of hiding at last.

Mum also found a basket of old bras from when she was the same cup size as me.  They're now too small, so she offered them to me. o_0  Um, well, I know I'm desperate for new underwear, but I was thinking more of taking a trip to Primark than wearing a hand-me-down bra.  Thanks, Mum, but no thanks...

Weighed a parcel for a Canadian Arena member - a kids' MLP umbrella.  The woman at the post office promptly told us that it would cost £25.99 to ship (it couldn't go via Royal Mail, and would have to be delivered by Parcel Force).  "You can't do that, especially not to Canada!" were her precise words.  I beg your pardon?  Royal Mail won't deliver anything over 2' long, whatever the destination. >.<  Anyways, with a few adjustments, I made the parcel just under 2' and returned to the post office.  But, despite it being fifteen minutes before closing time, the woman refused to see us again, as they had to have a break, you know?

Mum tells me that Emma started making more jibes about my intentions to move to Woodberry alone.  It's all about the food again this time.  "What's she going to eat - Pot noodles and Smash?  HA HA!"  Uh, well, considering there's not even a kettle there, I don't think that's an option...  "It'll cost a lot of money to go back to you (Mum) by bus every day for food..."  May I also point out that I don't travel alone in this area, so how does she propose I'd get back here every day by bus?  The food problem is the one real reason I haven't moved over there yet.  I just can't figure out how you can live without a properly functioning kitchen when you don't have the cash for fast food, even if you wanted to eat greasy chips or pizza every single night.

Also, David never want back to collect the sheet that they were supposed to be holding for us at the shop in Uxbridge.  I have another sheet which is supposed to be a spare, but I really want the pink one to go with my MLP duvet...

Mum was cutting up vegetables for our dinner in the kitchen when she screamed loudly.  I thought she must have cut herself and went racing to her aid.  Instead, I find her staring at something on the floor - a small, and very sweet, Cabbage White Butterfly caterpillar.  Apparently, the poor little thing had been in the broccoli and she flicked it on the floor in her shock.  I found another one still crawling in the broccoli, too.  I dropped them out of the bathroom window into our back garden (we can't open the back door for all the rubbish stacked up just inside, and I hate going out there with the rats anyway), but I fear they won't survive long as we have no Brassicaceae plants, and I think the poor little caterpillar who got flicked on the floor had been cut by the knife anyway.  I like to hope they were ready to pupate and will live their full lifespan though.  I wish we still had some insect-suitable plastic tanks, then I could have hand-reared them.

I checked on my ponies after dinner, and discovered that Red Roses has two pony cancer spots on her chin which I do not recall being there before.  I fear it was probably brought on by the heat and humidity in the back room.  It had to be Red Roses though, didn't it?!

Anyways, bearing that in mind, I decidedn to start moving my collection over to my bedroom at Woodberry, starting with Paradise Estate, which is supposed to be the main display in my bedroom on the top of the shelving unit.

It took two journeys to get it over there with both Mum and I holding a room each with another part in between us.  And even then I wasn't given a chance to assemble it as David had to go and buy some black bags at Tesco.

Still, I was pleased it was no longer on the floor right next to where I have to sleep.  I kept rolling on it in the night, and I sleep much more peacefully now that I know I'm not going to break my ponies' mansion if I move during the night.

Anyhow, it's late, so I think I'll leave it there.  I feel slightly better for having got a bit further with my blog anyway.  Perhaps I'll actually catch up again soon, presuming that dial-up doesn't cut out on me again, of course!

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Thursday, 27 August 2009

I'm sitting in the dark...

Current mood:  tired

...because the police just stopped a car right outside our house, and I want to be nosy and keep looking out the window - without them seeing me!  Anyways, please excuse any mistakes I make as I can't see my keyboard too well!

August 23rd 2009
I woke up extremely stiff and unable to move my neck too much all morning.  Basically, it seems I literally told myself to lie still all night so as not to roll over and smash Paradise Estate (which should have gone to Woodberry at this point).  It worked - I can't be getting very good sleep if I can control my every move during the night though, can I? - and I didn't move an inch, but I got pain for my efforts.

"I should have slept at Woodberry last night."  I said, more to myself than anything, as I put my bedding back in the library doorway.  Then Mum appeared.  "Don't talk to me about that - one minute you want to sleep over there, the next you don't!"  Um, well, actually I wasn't talking to you, and I never said I wasn't happy with sleeping over there.  Welcome to another wonderful Grottsvillian morning, Desirée!

"Anyway," Mum continued, "I have no intention of letting you take any food over there with the builders coming back."  I give up, I truly do.  How shall I ever escape from this place?  And to be honest, I really don't want to live over there any more anyway, with Sickton right opposite us and having missed yet another year as far as education is concerned.  I may have said that, but certainly nothing about not wanting to sleep alone.

Following the Grottsvillian morning, I endured an entire Grottsvillian day.  Quite literally.  David spent all day up in the front bedroom sorting through pictures of women again, and so he didn't have time to take us out.  Then he'll be moaning at Mum for not coming up with wall colours again!

When he went in the bathroom, we managed to clear enough of his junk out of the way to get to one of the cupboards in the room.  It was full of all kinds of junk I thought had been thrown out years ago, and other stuff I don't even recall ever owning.

We found some old toys of mine which we must have put away in there eight or nine years ago.  Most of the stuff will be going to Emma's kids as I don't really need it any more and I've got to stop being so sentimental over things.  After all, why would I want a kids' dress-up policeman's hat, a toy drum or a plastic teddy bear bath toy?  I'm just being silly...and it certainly wasn't me sitting there wearing that policeman's hat and playing a Little Tikes pinball game when Mum walked into the room.  Nah, that was some other idiotic 18-year-old who lives here with us; I've just failed to mention her before.  Honestly!

I was pleased to find one little laundry bag at the back of the cupboard, though.  It as filled with some of my favourite toys from the mid-90s - I got rid of about half the bag (mainly bouncy balls which had gone cloudy, and battery-operated toys with leaking batteries which were beyond repair), but I did keep all the figures from a Budgie the Little Helicopter set, and the Mr Blobby figurine that played the part of Christmas Fairy on top of our Christmas tree in 1993!

In the bottom of the bag, I found two items I was most pleased to see again.  I was a little saddened to find that my favourite squeaky caterpillar has gone brittle though.  She still lets out a feeble squeak if you delicately press near her neck, but pieces of plastic keep falling off, so I don't think I'll be able to keep her for much longer.  Most importantly though, I found my Bucky O'Hare action figure.  I'm so pleased that I didn't throw him out as I had feared.  I rescued him from Mum's discarded jumble years ago - he's missing his pistol, but I'm still pleased to have him.  Now I only wish that my DVD worked properly and wouldn't keep stalling every five seconds!

Also in the cupboard I found ANOTHER Lullabye Nursery (that's a fourth!), a whole box full of Care Bears books, a box full of various other kids' books (all of my favourites having been chewed up by the mouse we weren't even aware had ever been upstairs - just typical, eh?) and a box full of toy animals who I could have sworn were under the stairs.  Oh, well.  I really need to sell some of this stuff, but even when I find potential buyers, they're put off by the shipping quotes to send it to them from this little desert island where I remain stranded.

August 24th 2009
I woke up to find I had knocked over the Paradise Estate gates once again...but remarkably it wasn't broken.  That thing must be a whole lot stronger than it looks, even after 23 years!

My wisdom tooth decided to make a nuisance of itself all day, pushing on my gum, although it never actually comes through.  Stupid thing - especially when it's going to have to be removed anyway when it comes to straightening my teeth.

Mum's family history e-friend very kindly sent me another couple of ponies - Desert Rose and Windy.  They were almost black when they arrived, but look much better now.  Desert Rose still has some issues with pink highlighter marks though.

David found a big box of McDonalds toys in another cupboard in the front bedroom.  We must have bought multiples of some toys, thinking they'd become valuable some day.  Yes, I know it sounds stupid, but once upon a time those things were rumoured to be the treasure of the future.  Now I think I'd struggle to get our money back for them.  Anyone want to pay £1 for an old MIP Bugs Life, Lion King or Winnie the Pooh Happy Meal toy?!  I did find we had a MIP set of all four G2 McDonalds Ponies, which was a nice surprise, as I regretted opening mine, plus three spare Sunsparkles and two spare Light Hearts.  Also an unopened McDonalds MLP jigsaw...which was quite funny, as I bought one on e-Bay a couple of years back to replace the one I opened...not realising that there was a sealed one in the cupboard!

At 2pm, Rob Jacobs (Sickton's friend, who is unfortunately still working for us, and who is supposed to be laying the front path tiles) rang up and announced he would be at Woodberry from 5pm.  Nice of him, almost a year after the job should have been done.

So David went over there, leaving us indoors again.  But no prizes for guessing what happened - Jacobs didn't show up.  So how come David stayed at Woodberry "playing on  the internet" until 9pm?  Meanwhile, I was left here battling to upload sales pictures to Photobucket with a dial-up connection.  >.<

At 11pm, David took me to first chance to leave this prison in three days.  And even then it was miserable.  David bought himself a load of cornish pasties which I would usually keep seperate to the rest of the shopping as it makes me feel a little sick to have meat in the same bag as my food.  No offence to you non-vegetarians, I'm just weird that way, especially when I know David loves winding me up over it.  But now there's hardly ever anyone working on the proper checkouts, so we have to use those self service things, and they are AWFUL.  If you want to make some space in the bagging area by removing a bag before you've paid an automated voice starts literally screaching at you, "ITEM REMOVED FROM BAGGING AREA!  PLEASE REPLACE ITEM BEFORE CONTINUING!" and she will not shut up until you replace the item, even if you don't want all your bags together.

But not only that, when you do replace the item that you dared to take and place in your trolley before the transaction was finalised, the automated voice will still not be satisfied 50% of the time.  "UNEXPECTED ITEM IN BAGGING AREA!  PLEASE REMOVE THIS ITEM BEFORE CONTINUING!"  This went on for some time, and it was driving me totally crazy.  Luckily, a member of staff came and typed in their security code, but for goodness sake!  Those machines seriously need re-wiring.  And Tesco need to replace their bags too.  During the moving backwards and forwards, four of our six bags broke to a point that they weren't really up to being carried.  Rather fun, considering I had to carry five, and David just carried his Cornish Pasties...which just happened to be in one of the two unbroken bags, of course.  And you can't just take another bag...otherwise you'd be removing an item from the bagging area, you know?!

Anyways, I'll leave it there.  It's late and I need to go to floor-bed.  Speak to you all soon!

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Tuesday, 25 August 2009

My voice is cracking again.

Current mood:  depressed

Yeah, it's partly allergies, but mostly caused by a deep depression, and I just can't snap out of it.  It's the end of August, another summer's gone by, there's no sign of actually moving unless I go and sleep at Woodberry alone like a squatter without so much as a carpet in any room besides my own bedroom, I never leave the house while David continues to leaf through endless newspapers and pictures of semi-dressed women, and to top it all off I just discovered my poor Red Roses has pony cancer, possibly brought on by being in that awfully hot back room, waiting to be allowed to move to Woodberry.

Anyways, you don't want to hear any more about that, do you?  We got in too late for me to start blogging again last night, so I shall continue the story now.

August 21st 2009 (continued)
David spent over six hours with Richard Butler - in fact, Mum rang him twice to find out what was going on.  "Oh, we have lots of problems here!" David said joyfully, as if he were playing an important part in the fixing of the computers.  The virus had got in through a USB drive, so he must have picked it up at the internet cafe, where Mum and I have told him not to use them.  "Oh, we don't know that - it could have come from the new BT CD-rom!"  Yeah, right.  The funniest bit was when Mum made reference to "Butler" on the phone, and must have been on loud speaker.  "Mr. Butler!" David corrected her, firmly.

Mr. Butler "only" charged David £85 for looking at the machines and even "threw in a new plug cable for my machine" (apparently, it was not the adapter that was damaged after all).  So now my computer is working again, but it's slower than ever!  Mr. Butler says that I have "a lot of rubbish on my computer" though (nice of him to judge), so that's the problem, not his wonderful computer...which has been slow since before I even saved anything to the hard drive.  Also, the only "rubbish" I have on here now is the album of sales photos which I can't upload to various sites until I have a broadband connection.

David and I went to Tesco at about 11pm - after the swine flu carrying crowds would have gone, you understand - in order to take advantage of the BOGOF pony offer I had seen two days previously.  No such luck.  The offer had ended that day.  Teriffic, eh?

August 22nd 2009
Didn't leave the house.  David "had a headache and felt too ill to go out".  I notice he didn't feel too ill to spend the entire day sitting on a chair in the front bedroom ripping out more photographs of women in various states of undress, or to come down in the evening and watch the football at full volume on TV right next to my left ear.

Having been promised that I could move to Woodberry alone, I took Paradise Estate apart and washed it ready to take over there.  But alas, the king of the car was too ill, as I already mentioned, so my pony mansion had to be re-assembled here on the Grottsville floor next to what passes as my bed.  So now, as well as being in danger of me rolling over and smashing it in the night,  it's getting dusty again, and I really don't want to have to wash that huge thing a second time.

The computer was so slow that it took TWENTY MINUTES to submit my blog, and Mum was really cross with me for keeping her up late, and rolled around the floor moaning about how she "didn't care which house I slept in, 'cause she was stuck rolling around the floor either way".  As soon as the blog was finally submitted, I switched turned off the computer and cleared her space on the floor so she could go to 'bed'.  But still she continued to rant at me.  "Don't give me any bl**dy sob stories if you roll on that Paradise Estate in the night!"  Huh?  "You didn't want to move over there anyway."  WTH?  I hadn't even raised the subject, but when did I ever say I didn't want to move over there.  My ponies are all I have left to live for; why would I want to stay here where my whole collection is getting ruined?!

I should have learned my lesson about never answering back to my parents, but I couldn't help but point this out to her, especially knowing how she and Emma are taking bets on how I wouldn't be able to live there alone, when I'm not even being given the chance to try.  "Well, considering I have no education, my ponies are my life.  Why would I want to stay here and watch them rot away to nothing?!"  She ignored me, so I continued.  "You told me you'd discuss my education after we moved house.  But the years are just passing by, and nothing's happening towards moving house.  What's going to happen about my education?  And why do I feel I'm the only one who cares that I don't have one?"  "Perhaps that's why you want education - if you had one, you wouldn't be so intense about it."  WHAT?!  Am I over-reacting on this one?  I don't think so.  Surely everyone is entitled to an education in this day and age?  And how else does she propose I should get to Vancouver?  Or even get a decent job within this country for that matter?  I have no intention of getting married to an Englishman, further tying myself down in this dump, as she seems to think, saving 'wedding money' etc.  And despite my actress goals, I have the sense to realise it's not very wise to only take drama classes, and have nothing to fall back on when you fail in show business.  So, in practicality, I need to get two lots of education...and I'm not getting any younger.

But, continuing the subject only made her angrier.  Her last words to me before she went to sleep were, "You're just making him (David) look more and more right when he says that you should have gone to school."  Who cares about the past?  I care about my future.  And there's not a whole lot anyone can do, even if I should have gone to school.  David was always claiming we were going to move to an area with a good secondary school.  Well, we didn't, did we?  So let's all move on now, and figure out what we can all do for ourselves now.  But no, my parents don't want to know.  Well, if they want to give up on their own lives, that's one thing.  But I'm not giving up.  However, it seems I have to figure everything out on my own...

Anyways, I have finally been offered the chance to leave this house (isn't it amazing how David only offers me the chance to go out when I start blogging?), so I shall try to continue with this when I get back.

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Monday, 24 August 2009

You have to sieze your chances...

Current mood:  excited

Your blogging chances, that is.  After all, I often can't post a blog on dial-up (hence, the absence of my promised blog last night), so even though I don't really feel like writing one now, I guess I should!

August 21st 2009

We decided to go and buy my bedding in Uxbridge on the morning of the 21st so that I could move into Woodberry this past weekend.  "The problem is getting 'ER up!" David snorted, nodding in my direction.  Well, excuse me!  I'm happy to get up at any time, and am usually awake before anyone else.  I admit that I often pretend to be asleep because I hate my life so much, and don't want to be awake.  But if there's a specific reason to get up, I do so.

Sure enough, I was awake before anybody else.  I woke Mum up, since she likes to go in the bathroom first (I "take too long" - about 20-30 minutes, I guess) and ended up getting a twenty minute barrage about colours at Woodberry...hence, I could have gone in the bathroom first, after all.  THEN they both complained that we didn't leave until 9am, blaming ME for being in the bathroom too long (how predictable!), because now there was a higher risk of catching swine flu than if we had arrived in Uxbridge at 9am. (?!)

The shop where we had intended to buy the stuff has closed down since we last visited the shopping centre.  But luckily we found another shop where I was able to purchase a duvet, two pillows, sheet and pillow case.  Doesn't sound like a big deal, but since I've never had a bed of my own before, I was really excited by it all!

Even then, David wanted me to get a sheet with pulled threads (10% off) and embarrassed me by asking if I'd accept it in front of the saleswoman.  Well, sorry, but no.  I've waited eighteen years - I shall have a pretty sheet!

On the way back to the car, I popped into The Entertainer.  Still no sign of the 'alien ponies' though.  They did have some of the new style Ponyville ponies, but my goodness, those heads!  They're so BIG!  I feel like the poor little things would topple over from the weight of those oversized things on their non-existant bodies.  What are Hasbro doing these days?

I was just saying something along those lines to 'Mum' when I turned around and realised she wasn't there.  They had a bubble machine at the front of the store, blowing clouds of bubbles everywhere, and she "didn't want to walk through them"!  No wonder the shop assistant behind me had been giving me funny looks while I spoke to someone who wasn't even there! >.<

Then we went in TKMaxx very briefly before the shops got too crowded, and I actually managed to find a pair of trousers.  They're leggings with an elasticated waistband so they're really comfortable but they look like ordinary denim jeans.  Mum and I were actually standing there trying to figure out how to open the false pockets for a couple of minutes.  And they 'only' cost £12.99.  Still expensive to my mind, but I'm just glad to have something to wear on my legs that doesn't have huge holes in it!

All the time that I was paying at the counter, Mum was waving a MLP slide puzzle book around on the other side of the shop and making me hold a silent conversation with her.  So I figure that shop assistant thought I was somewhat crazy, too!

Then we dropped the bedding off at Woodberry (well, we couldn't bring it all back to the carpet beetles here in Grottsville, could we?) and finished assembling the bed - excluding the drawers, anyways - while we were there.

Then we rushed back to Grottsville, so that David could go and see his "friend", Richard Butler, who sold both of our computers to us, to get him to replace this machine's adapter and get rid of the virus on David's laptop.  I'm not actually particularly keen on Butler since he kept Nick's old computer (complete with all Sparkle's photographs/my voice recordings etc.), claiming he couldn't save them, and I've since found out it may have been possible to get them off the hard drive.

Still, David went to see him for the afternoon, and Mum and I continued work in the front bedroom.  The first thing I spotted was this black bag which David must have half uncovered the previous night.

Care Bears placemats?

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

Upon looking inside, I found even more treasures.

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

Keypers, a Moondreamers Ursa Minor polar bear, MLP books...  I have never seen any of this stuff before.  I guess my parents had gathered it for Christmas gifts (or possibly a New Year treasure hunt) for me many years back, and it got covered over by all David's junk.  Below is a photo of all the treasure I discovered:

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

Alas, most of it has been badly crushed by the junk heaped up on top of it all, but I think the Care Bears placemats will flatten out in time, and possibly the books too.  By the way, there were a couple of upgrade MLP books, but besides those, everything will be for sale (including the books I booted out of my own collection when I upgraded with these). I need to check the Keypers against my own first though, to determine which are the best condition-wise.  And all my Keypers are stuck at the back of a cupboard in the last room we need to clear out.  But if you're interested in anything, give me a shout.

With those items out of the way, we finally reached Mum's beloved rocking chair.  And, I'm sorry to say, it too has been badly damaged by the weight of all those newspapers and magazines.

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

Mum was in tears, as she's been waiting to see this chair again for years.  We had no idea it was at the centre of the room, under the most pressure from David's junk.  To give you some idea of the quantity of rubbish, this is a photo of the chair even after we had 'uncovered' it.

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

I'm just so mad at David for having so little regard for other people's property.  And when he came back from visiting Butler, he didn't care a bit about Mum losing the chair, only about blaming other people (i.e. ME) for breaking it.  Apparently, "my bl**dy Care Bears stuff did it, not his papers".  Um, but I didn't even know about the bag of gifts I never received, they weigh only a feather in comparison to his papers.  And who cares about whose FAULT it is anyway?  The thing that matters is that Mum's precious chair is broken!  She cheered up when I suggested she kept it and put a cushion and favourite teddy bear on it at Woodberry, but it's not the point, is it?  How can David do that kind of thing and not even say he's sorry?!

Anyways, I need to go to Tesco and get some shopping now, so I shall continue this tale when I get back...there's not a whole lot to say about the weekend anyway, so I'm hoping I can get this up to date before I go to sleep tonight at least.

Thanks for reading, everyone!  Speak to you all soon!

Desirée Skylark  xxx

Saturday, 22 August 2009

Slow, slow, slow... Dial-up blogging, here we come!

Current mood:disappointed

On a day that I should have moved to Woodberry, I'm here in Grottsville, back to writing blogs via a dial-up connection.  Why?  Read on for the full story!

August 19th 2009
Despite David's threatening comments, we started work clearing up in the other front bedroom here which David has totally filled with his junk over the years.  I could describe the pit, but you'd all just think I was exaggerating, so here is photographic evidence of the crazy world in which I exist...

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

He was overseeing the builders at Woodberry as usual, so we rang him up and told him we were starting the job, so there wasn't really a whole lot he could do about it.  We can't throw out a lot of his stuff without him noticing, so we decided to drag it all out and stack it neatly in the ex-communal bedroom which we had cleared so that he had no excuse for not sorting through it all.  By this point, we had figured out that our stuff was buried UNDER all that heavy paper!

Mum snapped at David on the phone about the money he's wasted over the years on newspapers and magazines, a lot of which he's never even read, as proved by their sealed cellophane packaging.  He's always claimed we can't have this and we can't have that because we're "broke" while he continues to add to all this rubbish on a daily basis.

All David could say was, "If you find anything you want, you can have it!"  Oh yeah, well, he's safe saying that, isn't he?  Why exactly would we want a load of men's magazines and neatly folded copies of page 3 from the Sun newspaper dating from the 90s?

After digging for some time, we found Mum's print of "The Laughing Cavalier" which she saved from her grandmother's flat.  The frame has been crushed by the weight of all David's rubbish.

Then we found yet more mouse evidence.  Loads of shredded newspaper and carrier bags, along with droppings.  God knows how long it's been there, but it doesn't look like it dates from the last mouse we knew about five years ago...  Another good reason not to store rubbish in your front bedroom for years.

We also found some old photos of David when he was younger, including a few with his parents...those were all protected, of course, unlike our possessions.  It was the first time I've actually knowingly seen a photo of my grandfather...and it was so many years ago that I saw my grandmother it was quite interesting to see her again.  I can't really see that I look anything like them - I think I look more like Mum's family, but perhaps that's just wishful thinking - but David's dad has exactly the same crooked teeth as I have, so perhaps he's the one who cursed me.   David looks exactly as he does now, even as a little tiny kid, just without glasses and with more hair, so that makes for quite an interesting photo!

When David came back from Woodberry, we asked what he proposed to do with all this mouse-sheltering picture-crushing rubbish.  "I'll throw some away,"  he said quite proudly, "but the rest will be staying."  He says he'll keep it at the storage where does he think he's getting the money for that?!

On closer inspection, I discovered my Hasbro plushie Firefly also has holes.  They're mainly in her back left leg which I can cover up with her tail, but I'm still depressed.  I need to get my ponies out of here, but I don't even know which to move first, with Paradise Estate in danger of being smashed if I roll over in the night, my plushies being eaten by insects and my G2s going sticky in the heat of the back room...

In the evening, we went to Tesco.  They had new Newborn Cuties and Ponyville sets on a BOGOF offer, but I decided to leave them since we had a voucher for £2 off when you spent over £10 on toys at Tesco, and I hadn't brought it with me.

I did find some Dolly Mix Ponies in the reduced bin though - two reduced to £1 and three to £1.29, which is kind of odd in itself.  I got 2 Cheerilees, 1 Pinkie Pie, 1 Rainbow Dash...and strangest of all, a Sweetie-Belle with two-tone pink hair (rather than pink and purple)!  I'll try to get a photo of them together, as she really is quite a curiosity.  I'll be putting one Cheerilee and RD up for sale; the rest are all upgrades, although I'm considering selling my old loose Dolly Mix ponies (Pinkie Pie, Toola Roola, Rainbow Dash, Sweetie-Belle and Cheerilee) in the future too.  Watch this space!

August 20th 2009

Spent another morning digging in David's newspaper pit, and uncovered - wait for this! - one leg of Mum's rocking chair.  Well, actually it was her mum's chair, which her dad bought soon after they got married.  Anyways, even after all that hard work, this was all that could be seen of the precious chair.

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

How can David be so inconsiderate as to dump all his junk on top of other people's stuff?!

That being said, I decided it was high time that I rescued my remaining pony plushies from the other side of the ex-communal bed (which David has also filled with newspapers, blocking my path to my ponies), especially as the bed was getting further blocked in by junk from the room next door.

Poor little things stuck on the other side of the room...

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

It was a long job, and Mum was annoyed that I was stopping her getting to her rocking chair in the meantime, but I had to do it before any more damage was done and this was my last chance before the communal bed was totally blocked in.

The rescue mission required a long stick which my mum's grandmother used to use for grabbing things from her wheelchair after she lost her leg...

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

I don't think the ponies minded though!  They just saw it as an adventure!

Strangely, these ponies haven't really been too badly affected by the insects.  Parasol and Windy both seem to have some thin plush in places, but nothing really noticeable like the ones I packed away in that crate to be "safe".

Then came the worst horror - I saw four legs poking out from beneath the radiator down on the FLOOR.  Obviously one of the poor things had fallen down next to the spare foam (insect-filled) cot matress by the bed!  It took a lot of courage to pull her out, and once I did, I discovered that poor Pinkie Pie had grown a beard!

Image deleted by Tinypic before I had the sense to re-upload all my photos to my Photobucket album and update all the links.  I apologise for any inconvenience caused!

Fortunately, it seems as though the insects were too busy munching the matress to use Pinkie as a tasty treat, although she was covered in carpet beetle skins.  The foam has since brushed off, so she looks almost as good as new, thank goodness.

Mum and I continued to work on the bedroom of newspapers, and the next thing we came across was a huge snowman plush toy that someone gave my grandad "to give to his grandkids" at his residential home.  Grandad gave him to me and I have been looking for him every Christmas since then, but David lost him in the newspaper pit, I guess.  No problem - I've found him now, at least.  BUT he was covered in some kind of brown goo.  I dread to think what it was...horrid as it sounds, I can only describe it as looking like someone couldn't make it to the bathroom in time.  We've managed to clean most of it off, but he still has a yellow tinge in places.

David came in early, announcing that the builders had left - a day earlier than agreed.  Not to worry though, he gave them £200 less than the original total (nowhere near the correct percentage ).  They're supposedly returning in ten days to finish the job, so David has allowed them to keep the front door key.  Nice of him, considering I was supposed to be moving in today.  I really want a load of strange men being able to walk in whenever they feel like it, don't I?!

David began clearing up along with Mum, blocking me from the small space we had cleared.  And my goodness, he wants to keep everything.  We'll never get the place cleared now that he's here all the time.

"Where do you think you're going to put all this stuff?" I asked him.  "We'll put the stuff in your room as soon as you leave."  He sneered back.  Nice, after I've waited 18 years for this bedroom.  And even if it were supposed to be a joke, it was a rather mean one when he knows how desperate I am to fledge the nest, but I have no education and no intention of finding a bloke to marry (at least not here in England), hence no way of leaving and getting out of his way.

He also announced that his computer had a virus, so I had no way of getting online, despite trying to organise a couple of sales two days previously.

In the evening, we went to Woodberry and tried assembling my bed.  We spent about an hour trying to put together one drawer - the glue is totally useless.  We spent another hour getting the bed to this stage:
Okay, so it still doesn't really look like a bed, but I'm quite proud considering it was me who finally figured out the instructions (Argos gave no written instructions whatsoever - just very confusing charts!)

Mum was wandering around, bored, the whole time we were working on the bed, and happened to sit down on the floor and look inside the bathroom cupboard for some reason.

Now, none of us had ever sat down on the floor and taken a good look inside the cupboard before, but I had noticed there wasn't much space in there.  What I didn't realise was that the cupboard has a designated area for the pipes hidden away behind a white sheet of wood.  But Sickton's stupid plumber has CUT A HOLE in the cupboard IN FRONT of the secret area and plumbed them in there, taking up all our cupboard space and leaving us with the ugly pipes we needn't have to look at every day of our lives.
Mum also wanted the woodwork in her bedroom re-painted grey for some reason (it was white with a hint of pink before), and now it looks awful, just as I said it would.  So now she wants it changed back again!  Mind you, the builders have painted it terribly with grey paint smudged all up the wall.  Why do these builders insist on decorating, too, when they quite obviously can't do the job?  Good builders should be builders and good painters/wallpaperers should be decorators.  I'm sorry, but they shouldn't get greedy and try to steal each other's work all the time.  It's just stupid and makes the place look such a mess!

Anyways, so much for telling you all "the whole story".  Mum is asleep on the floor now, snoring loudly, so I need to get to floor-bed myself.  I'll continue with the tale tomorrow, so hopefully I'll see you all back here then.

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Tuesday, 18 August 2009

More beetle (and mouse!) destruction

Current mood:excited

We spent the whole day clearing up the ex-communal bedroom, and found yet more damage.  This time the beetles had decided to pick on both of my 'half-pony' bags (Blossom and Cotton Candy) - they've taken half the canvas off the backs of them, and eaten part of the strap on the Cotton Candy one.  I just can't believe it.

Then, better still, we found mouse evidence on the floor, in the form of both droppings and chewed up paper.  We weren't aware that we'd ever had mice upstairs, and it's a horrible thought to think it had been climbing all around the bed most likely when Mum and I were still sleeping there.

It had chewed a big hole in one of Mum's favourite teddy bears, so now he has had to be thrown away too.

My carpet was re-laid today, and the builders also did some work in the kitchen, so it looks like I will be able to move in here this weekend at least.  Thank goodness for that!  At least I can keep an eye on my ponies then.

I can't spend any longer parents are getting restless again.  I did get a chance to add a song to my Myspace profile for the first time in months though, as you may have noticed by now.  I love Janyse's inspirational lyrics...and hopefully those lyrics will be pretty appropriate to me this weekend.

This day is mine,
I have to say it's got me smiling.
This day is mine,
Every cloud has a silver lining.
Hold on - it's getting better by the minute...
Hold on - The story's not done,
 It's only just begun...

This day is mine!
 And it's time to shine!
This day is mine by design;
I choose every step of the climb.
And I seize the day,
Grab and taste every single moment.
This day is mine!

Filmed in my mind,
The memories, they will last a lifetime.
The gifts I find,
Right here now this life is primetime.
Hold on - it's getting better by the minute! Yeah...
Hold on - The story's not done,
 It's only just begun...

This day is mine!
 And it's time to shine!
This day is mine by design;
I choose every step of the climb.
And I seize the day,
Grab and taste every single moment.
This day is mine!

Can you see it, hear it, feel it?
The love of my life!
Can you see it, hear it, feel it?
Coming on through,
A dream so true,
It's great to be alive!  Oh, yeah...

Ooh... This day is mine!
 And it's time to shine!
This day is mine by design;
I choose every step of the climb.
And I seize the day,
Grab and taste every single moment.
This day is mine!
Every single moment...
This day is mine!

Thank you for writing such beautiful music, Janyse.  I love to sing these tunes when I'm feeling low, and they really do get me smiling.

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Monday, 17 August 2009

My first post from Woodberry!

Current mood:  sad

Okay, so I'm not actually LIVING here yet, but David kindly let me use his computer - and fast broadband connection, which I am absolutely LOVING right now! - while my adapter still refuses to work.  He and Mum are discussing colours downstairs.

Mum and I have been working on clearing out at Grottsville all day - we finally managed to clear enough of David's junk out of the way to get to my plushie MLP collection...and the carpet beetles had got in the crate with them.

Needless to say, there were coccoons (and holes) everywhere, most noticably in the faces of my Applause Firefly and Hasbro Softie Blossom...i.e. my best condition G1 MLP plushies.  Surprise has also suffered badly but the holes are under her wing at least.  I am absolutely devestated.  Stupid as it sounds, I just sat there hugging them and sobbing for a full fifteen minutes.  Those ponies mean the world to me and if we had moved over here earlier it wouldn't have happened.  I feel like sticking a cannon out of the window above me and pointing it down the road at Sickton's house!  Of course, I wouldn't really do that, but to my mind he's harmed my children with those stupid builders who did absolutely no work for weeks on end and left us in Grottsville with the carpet beetles.

A lot of Mum's plushies are harmed too, but strangely a black bag of those that were on the floor weren't half so bad as my ponies.

Mum rang David (who was at Woodberry "overseeing the builders") ranting about Sickton, and expecting sympathy about my ponies.  Huh, some chance!  His exact words?  "Well, I'm sorry Jacqui, but SHE didn't look after them.  They should have been in storage."  WTH?  How does he know there are no insects at the storage depot?  And I couldn't have checked them if they were there, could I?  They only went in those boxes temporarily until we moved house, and HE was the one who blocked them in with all his files of rubbish.  But who cares about whose fault it is?  The point is that my poor ponies have been eaten alive.   And it's pretty mean to tell me it's all my fault when I'm already terribly upset.  At least Caroline's Wysteria is fine (as are all my G3 plushies actually).  Perhaps the insects only like older fabrics?!

I don't think David has been doing a very good job over here at Woodberry anyway.  This is my first time leaving the house since Friday, since David wouldn't bring Mum over here to look at colours yesterday morning as promised.  Now the Polish builders are leaving on Friday (as they always said they would) and David is blaming lack of colours.  But I dont see that they would had time to paint this place anyway.

However, THEY are now saying that certain jobs were not part of the price David is paying them anyway.  And - would you believe it? - David has still not learned his lesson and has no written contract to say what they're supposed to have done for the money!

Furthermore, they took the downstairs toilet out (it's in the back garden now!) while they painted that room - we have a replacement after Williams' men broke the old one, so the old one will be going anyway - and now I can't help but wonder where the new builders are relieving themselves.

Then I spotted a bottle in the hobby room full of some kind of liquid and simply covered with a towel instead of a lid.  The liquid is, um, to put it bluntly, urine-coloured.  I just wonder...  And all this right next to my brand new bed frame and mattress too!

Anyways, my parents are nagging me to get offline so Mum can have a turn now, so I must go!  I don't know when I'll get another chance to write to you all, but I'm still going to remain hopeful and sign off by saying...

"Speak to you all soon!"  xxx

Sunday, 16 August 2009

I may be offline for a while...

Current mood:  depressed

The adapter has packed up (again!  This time after only a few months!), meaning the laptop is running on batteries, and I only have about thirty minutes left online.  Anyways, rather than writing one or two messages, I thought it was best to write a public note here that everyone could see just in case people wonder where I've gone.

I'm so sick of everything going wrong - I've gone into a deep depression again, Mum is "at the end of her tether" with me.  She says I should go to a doctor as there's obviously something wrong with me, but I'm just sad that yet another year of my life is going to drift by with no education.

I still intend on moving into Woodberry after the carpet is relaid tomorrow afternoon, so now Emma and Mum are having a nasty little conversation about that too.  As Mum proudly says, "She tells me what she thinks of Emma, and she tells Emma what she thinks of me"!  Well, basically Emma is saying that I won't survive five minutes in a house on my own, without the following things.

Phone (We have no phone here except for the mobile phone, and anyway, I have nobody to ring!)
Television (I hardly ever watch TV.  There are only two more episodes of 'Intelligence' which I intend on coming back here to record.  Then I'll be quite happy without a TV.)
Food (Well, I admit that's a problem since the kitchen is still not finished.  But considering my parents had all the milk yesterday, so I had no breakfast this morning, and we only have four slices of bread to last until tomorrow night, I don't think it's going to make much difference!)
Money (God, that's a laugh!  Why would I have any less money at Woodberry than I have here?)
Internet (Well, looks like I'm going offline anyway, so now we'll see if I can survive without it!  Of course, I'll miss you guys terribly...but since we have broadband over there now, it should actually be EASIER to use the internet...presuming I can get a new adapter)

Besides all of that, why would I not like it on my own?  I can leave the house when I want, hopefully get some decent clothes with the cash I've saved which I can hang in my cupboard until my wardrobe is delivered (there's a hanging rail in the cupboard due to the carpenter's stupid mistake!), and at least I won't have people telling me how awful I am to live with all the time.  Not to mention I NEED to get away from these allergy-causing carpet beetles and rescue my ponies from the heat of the back room.

Anyways, now I am even more determined to prove myself.  If I can't even live in Woodberry with my parents popping over now and again, how will I ever be able to survive totally alone in a little Yaletown apartment, five thousand miles from my family?!

Please wish me luck, both with moving into Woodberry and with getting back online.

Thanks for reading, and best wishes to you all,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Saturday, 15 August 2009

Can't something go right just for once?

Current mood:  disappointed

I was supposed to be sleeping at Woodberry as of tonight.  Some chance.  Having finally been taken over there yesterday for long enough to get into my room, I discovered that my carpet had not been laid properly and the hardboard beneath is kind of bubbled up in three places, so that it springs up and down when you walk on it.

So now Allied Carpets have to come back on Monday afternoon to fix it, THEN we have to assemble my bed, THEN I can sleep there.

Good, 'cause my ponies are getting terribly hot in the back room, and I'm worried how it may be effecting the plastic.

Not sure what to say about today.  I'm terribly depressed and keep having awful anxiety attacks, which my parents just can't understand and so Mum just tells me to "learn to control it before the swine flu arrives" and David just turns the TV on and tells me to "shut up about how I can't breathe". Nice, eh?

I didn't leave the house again today.  What a wonderful summer!  David spent the day at Woodberry "overseeing the builders"... although he has absolutely no idea what work they've done today, and seems to have spent his entire time in his bedroom in the loft playing on the internet...thanks to me sorting out the broadband connection last night.

Meanwhile, I'm stuck HERE in Grottsville working with dial-up, attempting to update my sales albums and delete the things I've sold over the past few days.

It took me SEVEN HOURS to update three albums (on the Arena, Photobucket and Facebook).  I still can't update my Myspace Sales Album so just count that as totally void and out of date for the timebeing.

Mum sorted out a drawer of stuff under the ex-communal bed, and found a load of her old teddy bears...about two thirds of them had been eaten beyond repair and had to be thrown out, which really upset her...I was downstairs trying to sort out the before-mentioned galleries, so I didn't see them, but they must have been bad.  I've never known Mum to throw out a stuffed toy of any kind before.

I attempted to wax my legs again yesterday (not sure why I bother when I have nothing but these horrible leggings to wear anyway), all the time being shouted at for being in the bathroom too long.  But she laughs if I want to have a bath even once a week (!) so she can't expect me to shave either.  It's just really getting me down now - I've got so many of my own problems to figrue out without my parents being so silly all the time.  Still, I can see I am improving - I'm going to get myself a couple of nice dresses and some skirts after we move even if it isn't summertime anymore.  I just want to be myself at last, and set my feminine side free.

'Intelligence' was great last night - as always.  I'm so sad there are only two episodes left in the series.  I can truthfully say it's the best crime drama series I've ever watched, and such a tragedy they stopped after just two seasons.  I know I've said that (many times) before, but I can't help but say it again.  I just don't know why all the best shows get cancelled before they reach their full potential.  Oh, well.

Ugh, one last little horror for the day.  David went to get us some chips at the chip shop down the street.  As he opened the door, I walked out into the hall, and a man came walking up the front path.  None other than David's brother, Mark.  He looked straight up the messy hall and must have seen me standing there, in my rags and with my scruffy hair.  It was horrendous.  Especially when all his kids (my cousins, although it seems weird to think of them as such) were sitting in his posh car, well dressed and quite obviously in need of absolutely nothing.

I'm not sure if I've ever told the tale of David's family, and specifically his mother (my Irish bloodline, that is) and her unfairness?  Perhaps now is the best time to tell it, since I have nothing else to say in this blog.

David has a younger brother called Mark.  He's about fifteen years younger than David, but I'm not sure of his exact age.  Soon after Mark was born, David's father (my grandad) got cancer - he passed away when Mark was four, leaving all of his money to his wife (my Irish grandmother, David's mother).  While Mark doesn't even remember him, David recalls his father asking him to look after his family.

David was in university, studying for a top civil engineering job (I don't even know specific details about that - that's how secretive David is when it comes to his past).  But after his dad died, he dropped out of uni, and got a job as an estimator (a lower CE job, which he was qualified to do at the point he dropped out) to support his mother and Mark.  He paid ALL their bills for OVER TWENTY YEARS, while his mum sat on all his dad's money, and even did a fiddle to help Mark get to college for free by temporarily putting some of his mum's inheritance in his own name.  (Rather hilarious, when he won't even help me get to college!)

Then he met Mum and moved just around the corner (he didn't want to lose touch with his beloved family) to this dump with her in about 1988.  Even then, Mark shared the joint credit card (instead of my mum, David's own WIFE) for several years, and he continued to pay to rent a VCR for them, even though he and Mum didn't have one.

For reasons best known to herself, David's mum didn't like my mum...perhaps due to the fact she took David away from his bill-paying job at their place?!  Anyways, after my parents moved in here, Mark and his mother moved away as fast as they could, and never wanted anything to do with us.  Mark, being a particularly nasty little creep, seems to have then worked on their mother to make her hate David even more.

In 1993 (when we were actually visiting quite often), their mother wrote a will leaving David the very LEAST she could without him being able to contest it after her death (about £16,000, I think), while Mark was left the house, all its contents, and the rest of the money - well into three figure thousands, I believe).  She even put in a clause that if David died before her, I was to get nothing.

I never saw her after 1993, or maybe early 1994.  I remember the day clearly - I was pulling a little pull-along dog toy, which proves how small I was.  We got to the doorstep and she slammed the front door in our faces.  I have no idea why.

Anyways, come 1999 when she passed away, Mark got everything, including the house and all the money that wouldn't have been there had David not paid the bills for all those years.  Mark married an Irish woman named Mary and has about three kids.  They live in Nottinghamshire now, but every time they come down here they take the opportunity to come around her and brag about how well-off they are thanks to David helping his mother instead of doing something with his own life.

And then David gets jealous...not of all the money that was rightfully HIS (or ours, not that we'd have ever seen any of it anyway), but of the fact that Mark has two SONS, while David only has me, a useless daughter.

Quite frankly, life just makes me sick.

Well, that's my rant for the day.  I ought to get to floor-bed, I guess, since I'll not be able to sleep in a proper bed for at least another two days now.

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Wednesday, 12 August 2009

I'm tired of the same old arguments.

Current mood:crazy
Life's just getting me down again.

I thought this year was going to be so much better, but it hasn't been, has it?  In fact, it's been the worst of the lot.

I thought I'd enjoy this summer; I always dreamed I'd have my driving license by now (hilarious, considering I can't even afford a single lesson!) and could have driven myself to the seaside a couple of times this year.  At very least, I thought we'd have moved to Woodberry, I'd have been wearing clothes I felt comfortable wearing, and been able to leave the house when I wanted.  Instead, I haven't left the house all summer except to visit the house where I should be living, and a couple of trips to the supermarket, holding my breath to "prevent swine flu".

I thought I'd be going to college this autumn.  I was scared this would be yet another wasted year, and Sarah tried to talk me into going to a drama school in Vancouver but there was no way I could have afforded it, and no way I was taking anything off of her, despite her kind offer.  Now - instead of that, I'm still in Grottsville with no prospect of education for ANOTHER YEAR.

Which kind of brings me into the start of my blog about today.  I woke up this morning with my throat completely filmed over, unable to breathe or swallow.  There's obviously another bunch of carpet beetles around, as we're seeing them all over everything, munching through yet more of our precious possessions whilst we're stuck in this dump.

By the time I'd cleared my throat, David had gone out to Richmond to buy a sample pot of Laura Ashley's 'Wisteria' paint without us, and Mum started screaching at me that I had "stopped her getting out of the house during her one chance of the week" .  Apparently, everyone stays indoors on Wednesday mornings, so there's less chance of catching swine flu (?!).  She then starts moaning - totally out of the blue - about her family history e-friend of three years.

Apparently, Jill dared to mention that she's gone to the hairdresser, and Mum told her that SHE would never waste her money on a haircut and would rather have a magazine to read.  So it's turned into a nasty argument between them, and it looks like Mum won't be speaking to her "friend" for much longer.

Mum's been a bit anti-Jill ever since she said something against David spending so much money on newspapers and book storage whilst we don't even have any proper dinner most days...which, of course, Jill wouldn't even know if Mum hadn't told her in the first place!  I pointed out that a lot of my e-friends had shown concern about David spending all the money before we moved house, despite the fact he promised to pay for me to go to college.

Suddenly, Mum flew off the handle, shouting at me that I "have a big mouth" and she "wouldn't dream of telling Emma and Jill about David taking a £60,000 payout instead of his full pension".  Well, why not?  Does she want them to think we're living off of a huge pension that doesn't exist?  £20,000 of the £60,000 has already gone on bills anyway.  The rest is being frittered on silly things like books and (stupid as it sounds) chocolate mousses.

Yes, this is the latest argument.  David bought himself a pack of six new - and very expensive - organic chocolate desserts.  He's now trying to claim that he bought them for us all to share, despite the fact he knows that A) They contain gelatine and B) Mum hates chocolate desserts.  Meanwhile, Mum and I are starving, eating bread and butter for almost every meal, and tonight we didn't even have that much (More about that later).

Anyways, back to the main subject.  "What do your bl**dy friends expect?" Mum screached.  "That's his life savings!  Is he supposed to send you to f***ing Vancouver with them?"  Um, excuse me?  Nobody EVER asked them for a penny towards our Vancouver ideas - it was something Sarah kindly suggested when we figured out I wasn't going to get any kind of academic training over here.

I was left speechless, so Mum continued, "I don't like your friends.  They're all short and skinny, and most of them are mental."  God, talk about cooties!  How immature and sad coming from a 52 year old!  And more to the point, who the heck is short, skinny or mental, as she put it?  The vast majority my e-friends are taller than me (although I guess 5'2" isn't really what you'd call 'tall', eh?) and of average build, and all of them perfectly sane as far as I'm aware.  Sure, most of us have/had depression/anxiety issues at some point, but I love being able to talk to other people with similar problems to myself.  It makes me feel better able to cope with my own panic attacks.  And please recall that Mum is just 4'10", so who exactly is she to talk about height anyways?  And what difference does it make if someone's 4'2" or 6'6"?  It's what's inside that counts, right?!

The day dragged on.  Mum sorted through her old Sindy dolls and found yet more carpet beetle larvae devouring their clothes.  I made some sales posts and hopefully have found homes for a couple of items (now just to get them weighed), and looked into setting up David's e-Bay account to sell as well as buy.  But the fees are ridiculous!  They take 10% of your final selling price as well as Paypal taking 3.4%?  And if you want to list something for more than a 99p starting bid you have to pay a 50p+ insertion fee on top?!  Now I see why people charge such ridiculous amounts for postage and packing!

Then David rang up to say that my bedroom carpet had been laid and the builders had painted the eau de nil wall at the bottom of the loft stairs.  "What does it look like?" Mum asked.  "Hmm... a bit different to mint crisp." David concluded.  He knows how to infuriate Mum (who hates mint crisp), doesn't he?!

"Come back here at once!" she ordered, demanding that we must all go over and look at the wall NOW and she "didn't care if the bl**dy Polish builders heard her yelling about the bl**dy wall!"

I didn't really want to go and be embarrassed by my parents immature arguments, but I DID want to see my carpet so I went to go and change into my (semi) decent clothes...then disaster.  I discovered that my last pair of horrid blue leggings are splitting down the seams.  What the heck am I going to do, since Mum won't go near shops due to swine flu?  She says we'll have to dash back to the market stall where these came from and get yet more of the ghastly things!  NOOOOOOOOO!

Well, one other thing she suggested before that - she said I should save the partially ripped ones for "special occasions" and wear my real scruffy trousers...which are really too indecent to wear around the house except for the fact I have nothing else to wear.  No way was I doing that in front of the Polish builders!  Anyways, whilst I was upstairs she took it out on poor Jill again, who was now snapping back in defense of herself, I think.  By this time, Jill was telling her how all female Jehovah's Witnesses (like Jill) wear skirts to the Kingdom Hall, and Mum was saying how ridiculous this was and how she would never dream of wearing anything but trousers.  Well, good for her.  But don't expect others to live by your rules!

Fast forward a bit, since it's very late (despite the juicy story about the woman two doors away calling the police about a gang of thugs across the street).  We arrived at Woodberry.  The builders seemed very friendly, smiling and greeting us - something Williams's builders never did.

I took one quick look at the two green walls (which don't contrast and "look exactly the same as each other" , by the way) and snapped a photo before Mum arrived, yelling, "Oh, my GOD!" in a disgusted tone...

...then I took my shoes off and jumped into my bedroom to hide from my parents petty arguments and the builders' shocked faces.  The carpet is GORGEOUS, at least in texture.  It's so soft and plushie, I kept sinking in it!  The only problem is that when it gets brushed up the wrong way, it tends to look a totally different colour.  It still looks messy in these photos because it hasn't been hoovered yet, but you can get the basic idea anyways.

Thanks to all of you who suggested a cream carpet.  I think it looks really good, although I'm still not sure how to keep it clean especially now that it's been laid with the builders still working there.  I'm still intending on moving in there as of saturday night (or at least sleeping over there), parents or not.  I need to get my ponies out of here because they're being eaten to pieces, and now going sticky in the hot back room too!

We had to rush back here because Mum was getting into another angry 'hit the wall' type of mood.  But I was supposed to be going back tonight to set up the broadband connection over there (David can't understand it) and to hoover my carpet.

When the time came to leave, Mum made a big fuss of whether or not she should come.  She "didn't want to be left alone in Grottsville after dark" but she "didn't want to come to Woodberry and be disturbed by the ugly green walls" either.  In the end, she decided not to, so I went upstairs to get changed again.  I was just about to come downstairs when a familiar voice yelled at me, "YOU'RE NOT GOING OUT, OKAY?!"  Okay, sure, now I'll just change out of these partially ripped trousers again, all the time trying to keep them going until I can get out of here and go shopping.  Why couldn't she have said that BEFORE I changed my clothes again?

David got angry and announced he was going anyway (he'd left his computer over there).  Nice for him.  He wanted to hoover my carpet, but I wouldn't let him, since I know he wouldn't take his shoes off and he'd make the carpet filthy with all the plaster dust that's still all over the landing floor.  He left at 7.45pm, saying that he'd just pop into the internet cafe on his way back, and then take us to Asda to get some muffins or (dare I say it?) yet more bread for tea, and something for dinner tomorrow.

Mum went to sleep on the lounge floor and I caught up with all my online correspondence.  To be honest, I lost track of the time, but at least I'm all up to date now.  When Mum awoke, it was 11.15pm...and David still hadn't arrived back.  Where the heck was he?  She rang him up...and he said he was "messing about with his bedroom shelves".  Huh?

He came back via Tesco (with no shopping list, of course).  To give him credit, he did try to ring us and ask what we wanted, but Mum rejected his call three times saying "if HE didn't want to take her shopping, HE could go without".  Um, but it's US going without food, Mum!

When he finally got back, he confessed where he'd been all that time - "I fell asleep at the bl**dy place" (That's Woodberry to those of you who don't speak David language).  Supposedly in his bedroom.  How do you fall asleep in an un-carpetted room, for God's sake?  If he went lazing around in my room, I will kill that man.  My bedroom is going to remain clean and tidy and my ponies and I shall entertain guests only when we want them!

And finally, having taken that little nap (for three and a half hours), Mum is now fully  awake and reading a holiday brochure.  In fact, I can see from here that she's comparing package tours to - my goodness, do my eyes deceive me?! - Vancouver.  WTH?  To be more precise, she's studying a photo of "those bl**dy boring totem poles" at Stanley Park.  HUH?  I thought she had "always hated totem poles and anything to do with Canada whatsoever...but especially those bl**dy totem poles.  That's all they ever mention in the 'Vancouven' reviews in my brochure - what a boring bl**dy place!"? (No, I kid you not.  She really says that - apologies to my Vancouverite readers!)  Admittedly, she's also looking at cruises from Alaska (where she does want to go), but she's certainly studying those Vancouver-only trips with a very strange look upon her face.  Why?  Whatever may she be plotting?  Perhaps she intends on going on a trip to see those "short, skinny, mental friends" of mine who reside over there for herself?  Be prepared, my dearest companions.  You may soon meet an even shorter, not-so-skinny but extremely mental lady...but don't worry.  She will most definitely be wearing trousers!

So, the moral of the story is, my friends, men fall asleep in unusual places, women say and do rather strange and random things at rather strange and random times, and YOU end up with no bread and butter for tea as a result.  Happy rest-of-2009, guys!

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Monday, 10 August 2009

Just a short note to say...

Current mood:  hopeful

It's too late to write a proper blog now, but I noticed that my Myspace blog is working again, and figured I'd write a couple of lines.

Basically, David is supposed to be having broadband installed at Woodberry from tomorrow.  We thought he meant that someone from BT was coming over to set it up tomorrow, but apparently not - HE is to set it up himself.  God help us.  He couldn't even figure out where the cables connected on this computer, hence I still have to sign in as a guest every time I access the internet!  I hope he'll let me "help" and set it up myself - that was the only way we got online at all last time.

Anyways, if its successful there shouldn't be any more blog-less days due to technical issues.  And I should finally be able to watch some stuff on Youtube and work on my voice acting again!

I'm hoping to start sleeping over at Woodberry from Saturday night (my carpet is arriving the day after tomorrow, but I want to be here on Friday for Intelligence anyway! ) and also that the ponies should be able to start travelling over there too, so the Rescue Home is officially moving at last.  Although don't hold your breath - I've been let down so many times over that house now.

Well, I think that's all for now.  I'm just writing some lyrics for a "farewell to Perivale" song to perform and upload to my profile if we can get the connection from Woodberry tomorrow night.  Wish me luck!

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Tuesday, 4 August 2009

"Nobody ever even attempts to clear this bl**dy place up!"

Current mood:  annoyed

Yesterday was so boring that I didn't even bother writing a blog, despite saying I was going to update this every day from now on.  We went to a couple of supermarkets in search of Weetaflakes, but it seems they are totally unavailable in London these days.  And the places were packed, despite us going just before they shut (ie. as late as we could), so Mum is convinced we'll have caught swine flu from all of the "dirty smelly people".

Speaking of dirty smelly people, our horrible Irish neighbours once threatened that they would "move out and get some dirty smelly people to come and live in their house" - this was during an argument regarding us building a higher fence about ten years ago because the crazed woman next door kept poking her head over the fence and staring at me every time I went to play in the garden and wouldn't give up until I went indoors.

Anyways, Mum and I were so pleased when we decided to move to Woodberry that we would get the chance to move out before them, and have always joked that we would stare at their house and poke our tongues out as we drove away for the last time...and then we'd sell the house to some "dirty smelly people" to annoy Lizz next door!

Well, guess what?  They just moved out.  Even they have beaten us to moving house!  I really can't believe it.  So I guess now some dirty smelly people might be moving in next to us, after all.

Today was not very interesting either, really.  We went to a few DIY stores this morning looking for a new dado rail to replace the massive one that Williams picked out...we found a much nicer one at Wickes.  We also saw something else there.  Just after I got out of the car, David calmly said to me, "Look, there's a rat behind you." and laughed.  I screamed and ran away and apparently the rat ran into a bush.  A posh-looking woman in a nearby car kind of sniffed and looked at me as though I was mad.  Well, would she have hung around if there was a rat right behind her?  I think not.

My Italian Windy hasn't arrived.  I know she was coming from Ireland, but I won her a week ago now so I'm worrying a little.  Especially having seen our new crazy postman today.  He spent over ten minutes rummaging through his bag (which was balanced on our neighbours' wall) and checking and re-checking our house numbers today - when he eventually arrived at 4pm, that is - so I wouldn't be at all suprised if my poor little pony had got lost somewhere along the way.

A parcel I sold to a girl in Texas has gone missing too.  It wasn't too valuable - a Dolly Mix Star Song and a couple of MLP hats - but still disappointing for the buyer and devestating for me as a seller as I'll now probably end up swallowing the shipping costs as well as losing £4.50 worth of my sales goods if I have to refund her.  It's the first parcel  of mine that's been lost in over two years of online trading, and it's really un-nerved me to the point I don't feel like selling anymore.

But I can't stop now.  There's so much junk to clear out of this house, and I really do need the little bit of money I make from the sales.  I uploaded a whole ton of stuff to my Photobucket album yesterday, by the way, if anyone's interested.  Mainly random plushies, books, videos, toy dinosaurs etc., but also a few old Polly Pocket sets, a plush Flower Popple, a G2 MLP watepaper bin and some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from the late 80s/early 90s.

Please feel free to take a look, and remember, if a price is too high, just make me an offer.  I'll take any reasonable price, and am especially happy to make a deal with my friends here on Myspace.

David is snapping at me about the sales stuff heaped up all around the house.  He says anything I don't want should go in the bin.  Well, that's easy for him to say, while he busily spends all the money he took as a lump sum from his pension fund to pay outstanding bills on car hire, book storage and newspapers, but this is my ONLY way of making any money while I'm stuck here with no way of even getting a part-time job.

Today, Mum and I have been busily clearing up in Emma's old bedroom.  We threw out another two black bags full of stuff, plus a pile of boxes and some drawers from the old vanity table David ripped out ten years ago when he was going to let me have the room.

In order to get far enough into the room to clear out the rubbish, we had to move stacks of yellowed newspapers and Mills & Boon books from the doorway.  Of course, David was not best pleased when he returned from Woodberry this evening and saw all his stuff piled up on the landing.  He says we shouldn't touch his stuff.  Well, how else are we supposed to get to our stuff before it's all eaten by the growing carpet beetle population?

He angrily put a whole load of his books in a large box, and began staggering down the stairs.  As he came, he knocked down two piles of our stuff on the stairs.  There's nowhere else for this stuff to go, and yet he starts shouting at ME for leaving it there.  "If ya want this stuff, why 'asn't it got upstairs?"  Um, because we're trying to clear up upstairs and we don't want even more junk in our way?  When he returned from the car (having placed the box in the boot), he yelled at me again.  "And the stuff is still there!"  Well, did he think it would just magic itself into thin air during the two minutes he was out in the front garden?

As he went back upstairs, he muttered to himself (loud enough for us to hear, of course), "Nobody ever even ATTEMPTS to clear this bl**dy place up!"  Well, that's just not true, is it?  I said as much to his retreating figure.  He turned around, and sneered, "I've just thrown out a big box of books!"  "No, you haven't." Mum said.  "It's going to a paid storage unit."  "Doesn't matter!  I'm still getting it out of the 'ouse!" David snapped.  "I got rid of a black bag of newspapers to the tip earlier this week!  And I've got another one that's half full!"

Well, good for you!  We threw out more than two black bags just today!

Oh, and you know he's supervising the Polish builders every day now?  They got there early yesterday morning, and said the work will take 3-4 weeks because of all the damage Williams has caused!  So there's no way I will be getting to college this year again.  I really can't believe it.

But worse than that, he's letting them walk all over him, just like he did with Williams.  They were supposed to be fixing the door stops today, so that we could re-order my carpet and I could move in next week.  Instead of that, they've spent the past two days rubbing down walls ready for painting.  And apparently they've dumped all their tools in my bedroom!  Wonderful.  What would they do if I was living over there, as I was promised I could several months ago now?!

Well, I'll leave you on that jolly note.  I just want to download one more MLP commercial from Youtube, and then I'll have to be off to floor-bed, I guess.  I'm not looking forward to it, as I've had two very bad nights now filled with bad dreams and awful allergies.

Speak to you all tomorrow!

Best wishes,
Desirée Skylark  xxx