Tuesday, 22 December 2009

Stop that cough!

Current mood:  sick

Ugh, I am so fed up with hearing my own continuous coughing.  I obviously need to get out of this house, as my allergies are only getting worse... but how?  My parents won't even attempt to sort anything out, and I am completely helpless.

December 7th 2009

Despite his painful back, David got up and went to work bright and (very) early and didn't come back until 8.30pm.  So much for this job having sensible hours!

Emma wrote and told Mum that Nick had found some G1 MLP Christmas cards on their local church bric-a-brac stall for 5p each.  Thankfully, Mum was so excited to think that someone had actually found a MLP item (yes, she does get wrapped up in the excitement of the hunt!) that she couldn't help but tell me about the lucky find... so I was able to point out to her that Emma probably intended on actually using the cards as cards and WRITING on them - a big 'no' in pony collecting etiquette (well, mine at least), so she was able to warn her about what I would probably say should I receive a signed card.  At least it proves that I have Mum well-trained - it didn't even occur to her that Emma might not think of a 5p 1980s Christmas card as a special gift!

I went crazy and bought about £50 worth of reduced pony wear from RainbowWindy on the Arena.  I just can't resist a sale, even if I wouldn't normally be buying the stuff so am not technically making a saving at all!  Still, I have wanted to work on completing my Pony Wear for a long time, and it was great to be able to get so much stuff that I still needed through one transaction.

David was using his computer in the lounge and asked me to unplug it once he had finished.  As I did so, I had an electric shock.  Not a bad one, but enough to shock me (if you will excuse the pun!) and put me off of doing it again in future.  There's something terribly wrong with the wiring in this house, I swear.

Later, we went to Tesco - I found it hard to keep up with him and was getting quite breathless, presumably because I'm never able to move from the spot in this house.  That is also what's causing me to put on weight, no doubt.  I just want a little independence and to have somewhere to walk from my own front door.

December 8th 2009

Didn't leave the house all day - so much for my new year's resolution of never staying indoors for more than 24 hours... I think that was three years ago now?  It's been my resolution every year since then though.  A hard one to keep to when I am beholden to one of my parents to 'take me walkies'.  Okay, not quite.  But I feel like I'm their pet dog rather than a human being right now.

David finally sent a letter and payment to the lawyer to set the ball rolling on the case against Williams.  It should have been done long ago, though.  I'm so sick of nobody getting on with anything towards moving house for weeks on end.

David shipped out some Lotta Littles that I had been holding for someone for quite some time.  I was sad to see them go as I used to love those little things, but I desperately needed the money.   And I know they are going to a loving home anyway.  I also managed to sell two Care Bears for £4.  So it was a good day for sales!

Oh, and Fancy Feathers (the 2009 Convention 'Peacock Pony') arrived!  Not only was Sebby kind enough to pick her up for me when I couldn't get, but she also included a Christmas card - my only one this year, so very much appreciated - and the sweetest little MLP candle which her Mum apparently made from the 'mould and paint your own ponies' set.  I envy her ability to do so - I know I wouldn't even be able to breathe on those moulds without them shattering. >.<

December 9th 2009

I got up reasonably early (for my standards anyway!) and got all of my daily jobs done by 1pm, so that David could take me to Woodberry during his lunch break.  The reason?  Janyse was a guest host on 'The Juice', a local Kelowna radio station, and I was desperate to hear her and get a recording.  Poor Mum had to sit in the dark in this house from 2pm though, since she can't close the curtains herself so we did it before we left.

To be honest, we didn't get to hear much of Janyse during her hour and a quarter of 'hosting' anyway, as the regular hosts talked loudly the entire time.  They did play one of her Christmas songs though, and she read the weather as one of her characters every 30 minutes.  It was really funny to hear the likes of Pinkie Pie reporting the cloudiness and likelihood of snow flurries for the rest of the week!

I'd never really got to know the local Kelowna accent before now either - it was pretty interesting as Mum has a family history contact over there, and I'd often wondered what she sounded like.  What I find curious is how the English accent is pretty much the same for miles around London, and yet North American accents seem to vary quite distinctly with not so much distance between them at all (relative to the size of the countries, at least).  Well, perhaps I just spent too much time analysing dialects!

It was also interesting to hear the difference in the way they're dealing with swine flu.  Practically every commercial break (another difference between our countries - we rarely have radio commercials here in the UK, except maybe trailers for other shows that are coming up on that station in the near future) there was an announcement urging people to get the swine flu vaccination to "protect themselves and others".  Meanwhile here in the UK, we're talking about not even offering it to those who want it (like myself) because there's been a slow uptake in the priority groups they have been very slowly inviting to have the jab.

Mum was having another rant about Christmas, and pointed out that she doesn't have anything for my stocking this year (just as well, since my stocking is in the storage depot and David appears to have no intention of bringing it, or any of the other decorations, back here), and David - who is always proclaiming how much he wants Christmas - said that he "doesn't believe in stockings, as he never had one as a child".  Well, I'm not really surprised that his mother didn't bother with him.  Firstly, she was a miserable old so-and-so, and secondly, Mum often tells the story of how she made him up a stocking soon after they got married, and he opened it grumpily, staring at the TV the whole time, and eventually dropping it with about three gifts left in the toe.  How ungrateful can you get?!

We also pointed out that since he never took me anywhere to invest the £500 he gave me for my 18th birthday, I have been missing out on interest for the past seven months.  "Why seven months?" he asked, sounding quite seriously puzzled.  Um, because May was seven months ago?  I know time flies when you're having fun, but I have so far wasted seven months of my nineteenth year in this pit now, too.

This pit full of insects, may I add.  I discovered one of my beloved Chestnut Ridge horses now has a hole in his nose due to those pesky carpet beetles.  Mum shouted at me that it was my fault for leaving him on the floor, but he wasn't on the floor - he was on the windowsill, being checked daily for carpet beetle evidence.  The damage must have occurred overnight - that's how quickly these things move.

December 10th 2009

The lawyer rang David up, following his letter.  He says that he wants to get a barrister to write to Sickton as this case is too serious for him to handle, which I found just a little worrying.  Unless we can win this case, Mum will never live over there, and we will never leave this dump.

We had Tesco mushroom burgers for dinner, and they have 'improved' the recipe.  Ick.  Now they're full of black pepper which got stuck in all the phlegm in my throat and continued to sting the roof of my mouth for the rest of the evening.  Well, that made you feel nice and sick, didn't it?!

That evening, David and I went to Tesco and I fell in love with a range of kids' t-shirts.  I decided to take a gamble and buy one in the biggest size to see if they would fit - as it happens, it's quite big enough, but the neck is cut very low and I know that I wouldn't feel comfortable wearing it.  Not to mention the fact it came down to my knees and emphasised my huge thighs and hips.  Too bad, as they had some really nice ones in unusual colours.

Speaking of t-shirts, David had decided to get the roofing men back the following day, and invite them into the loft, despite the fact he knew there wasn't even a clear path up the stairs to the bathroom.  So I had to scrabble around and move all of my clothes from where they were screwed up on the airing cupboard door into a messy pile in the cot in the old communal bedroom.  Why can't I just have a wardrobe like a normal person?!

Anyways, my parents are arguing and putting me off of writing this blog.  So I shall leave it there for the night.  Thanks for reading, everyone!

Desirée Skylark  xxx

Sunday, 20 December 2009

Stupid panic attacks!

Current mood:  sneezy

Ugh, I hate when I keep having anxiety attacks, and there's nothing I can do about it.  Okay, Desirée, so you're wasting another Christmas in Grottsville with not so much as a tree - just forget about it, and try to think of it as any other day!  It's not worth giving yourself a heart attack over! >.<

December 3rd 2009

I had another nice long bath with the rest of Lush's Mr Butterball bath ballistic. (And I highly recommend it to all of you as well, by the way!  It smells great - presuming you like vanilla, that is - and works wonders on dry skin!)

David came back at lunch time as Mum had received a weird letter from her bank and wanted some help ringing them up and figuring out what to do.  Halfway through the phone call, the bloke got cut off... so David blamed Mum.  "You pressed 3!" he said, looking at the phone and seeing the number '3' on the screen.  How I laughed at the expression on his face when I reminded him that HE had pressed 3 in order to get through to them!

That evening, he offered me a drive to Kensington to buy the wonderful foam things that we were supposed to be rolling out on the floor to sleep on each night, but Mum got in a bad mood and refused to go.  I'm not even sure I understand what she was in such a mood about - apparently I "wouldn't stop moaning and had said something bad about Emma" but I hadn't mentioned Emma at all that day and in fact hadn't spoken that much at all over the previous hour or so.   I believe the real reason she didn't go was because she didn't want the foam things herself as it was kind of like another nail in the coffin as far as staying here was concerned.  And I must agree with her there - it seems as though everything David does is done with the idea of staying in this dump in mind.

Just as well really though, as I was quite happy to stay here and tape a couple of episodes of 'Supernatural'.  Yep, three and a half years after I missed the first twenty minutes of Shane's episode (having been enjoying a slice of cake on my 15th birthday too much to check the TV paper, to be precise! ) they finally aired it again on a channel we get on our TV.  Not that I could really watch it with Mum's constant teasing remarks in the background and "which one is him?" remarks.  I gave her the computer while I was sat in front of the TV, but she still managed to keep making silly comments.  I turned it off in the end as it was totally pointless attempting to watch it anyways.  Then Mum got all upset - "I'm not as interested as you think, you know." she said.  Be interested, just don't be so irritatingly 'interested'!!! >.<

I turned the TV back on so as to watch the next episode which followed on straight after, and in which Venus Terzo played a guest role.  Then Mum was back to her old tricks watching the TV the whole time even though I was wearing headphones so as not to disturb her.  "Ooh, that's her, isn't it?  She has cellulite on her face!"  Um...  Not interested, eh?  I call that strangely fascinated... but not in a good way.  What is Mum's obsession with cellulite anyway?  First she says that she can see it on the walls at Woodberry in the form of dirty streaks up the stairs, then she starts noticing it in people's faces.  I am slightly worried about her, that's all I can say!

After the show had ended, Mum told me she had been looking on e-Bay for Christmas gifts for me...  BUT YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T DOING CHRISTMAS THIS YEAR!!!  How am I supposed to get her a gift when I can't even get to the shops due to swine flu, let alone the little problem of never being able to go out on my own.  And since the Call of the Wild DVD I bought must have still been on the "recently bought" items list, I'm shocked that she was asking who Shane was in Supernatural... surely she could have just compared the pictures if she was really that crazily intrigued?!

She then proceeded to tell David how I had specifically given her the computer so that she could go pony hunting.  "I never get such a long internet turn at any other time of the year!" she said.  That's not true!  You just had a two hour session because I was stuck editing commercials from my recording!

David and I went to Tesco late that night, hoping to find some Blu Tack to hang my advent calendars up.  But apparently they don't know what Blu Tack is any more - "It is some sort of glue, yes?" asked a member of staff.  "No, not glue.  It's like plasticine to stick things on your wall." said David.  But the bloke just shrugged and went back to stocking the shelves.  Very helpful, I must say!

There was a 3 for 2 offer on all toys... but it only started the following day, so I couldn't take advantage and buy any ponies.  And the offer only lasted a couple of days, over the busy weekend, so we didn't get back there until it had already finished.

December 4th 2009
Mum announced that she wasn't bothering to write or send Christmas cards to anyone this year.  David stood in stunned silence for a few moments, before uttering, "You're not?  How will they get them then?"  I don't know... you could always do it yourself!

I didn't leave the house all day, since David worked ridiculous hours again... meaning he didn't do anything towards moving house again either.  He "has things to do... like work, you know?"  Nice for him.  But again, why couldn't he have got us out of here BEFORE he started work.

I spent most of the day attempting to sing, and came out with a pretty nice recording of 'Free' from Barbie's Princess and the Pauper.  Too bad about how my throat cracked up a few times due to these darn allergies.  I'm not sure if I can upload audio files online for free anymore (I think Putfile has gone... or perhaps it just no longer works with dial-up?) but if anyone wants to hear it, feel free to let me know of another website or drop me your e-mail address.  I would really appreciate your feedback.

In the evening, I watched my first Christmas movie of the year, 'Eve's Christmas'.  It has a rather peculiar plot, I must admit, but it was a decent enough movie.  Of course, I was really watching it to see Tabitha St.Germain, but this is one movie I'm glad I discovered through my voice obsession.  Perhaps I'm just a cheesy-Christmas-movie-lover though!

December 5th 2009

David hurt his back by "falling over Mum's bag of her dad's old tyes" on the landing, then he broke the airer in the bathroom by "falling over the bag full of Mum's photo albums" in there.  I am more inclined to think he hurt his back climbing over his own files on the landing, and then pulled himself up on the airer awkwardly because his back was stiff after another long book-reading session on the toilet.  Either way, he took it as a good opportunity to give us both a bad time.  "Why is your stuff lying around all over the house?"  Um... how about because we have nowhere to put it because all the cupboards (and an awful lot of space outside the cupboards) is full of your junk?

Mum and I woke up freezing cold, and I felt so miserable with my allergies etc.  But David just said "I told you that you should have got the foam, but you didn't take your chance!"  But how would that have helped my allergies, or the temperature?  That was just to try and give our backs some support!  Mum pointed this out, and asked when he was going to do anything towards moving house.  Just then, he reached into the fridge and obviously twisted his back again.  "F*** YOU!  You don't care about my back, why should I care about moving house?"  Well, your back would get a better a whole lot quicker if you had a proper bed to sleep in!

He went to Woodberry and supervised another single builder then came back here in the afternoon to wait for a bloke from Virgin to come and connect us up to broadband.  As the time went on, he realised that there was no way we could have a bloke in here anyway (we can't even get to any walls to see the electric points!) and got angry with us, even though we had been telling him for weeks that it was impossible.

Of course, he then slept all evening because of his back so I didn't leave the house again.  I just wish that we were in an area where I could leave the house without someone having to take me all the time!

December 6th 2009
We overslept badly, and yet I was still so terribly tired.  You can't get any proper sleep on such a cold, hard floor.  I really feel sorry for all the people sleeping out on the streets at the moment - the weather is truly awful.

We went to Woodberry and I fell asleep twice, once sitting on my floor and once on my hard wooden bed frame.  I just feel so much more peaceful over there - I wish we could actually live there rather than just going and visiting the place once in a while.

The latest reproduction tile looks nothing like the original fireplace ones - I fear it's hopeless.  Mum was so mad that she yelled at Sickton and his family again.  I can't say I blame her really; I'm just worried that she'll get in trouble.

Well, that's all for now, my dear friends.  My leg is numb from sitting on the same patch of floor for too long, so I really need to sign off and go to Allergy Land... sorry, I mean floor... bed.  I still don't feel any better about not having any decorations this year but I'm pleased to be another four days closer to catching up with my blog anyway.

Thanks for reading, everyone!
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Saturday, 19 December 2009

Frozen solid like a block of ice...

Current mood:  cold

...but if you think I'll give up my blog, no dice! ~ Galaxy from My Little Pony & Friends.

Okay, so those weren't the exact lyrics, but it was something along those lines and I thought it fitted the current temperature of this house just perfectly.  I am dreading sleeping on this floor tonight... I actually dreamed that I was walking through deep snow towards an igloo last night, with my blanket wrapped around my shoulders like a shawl.  Yes, seriously - it's that cold as to make your brain have weird semi-concious thoughts about temperature all night long!

November 29th 2009

I woke up with such horrendous pain in my hips that I could hardly drag myself up the stairs to the bathroom.  Not to mention my aching arm.  And then when I tried to clear my throat of all the usual muck that comes with sleeping on the floor with allergy-causing carpet beetles, I started coughing up blood which freaked me somewhat.  I think I probably just burst a vessel in my nose by blowing so hard to try and clear it the night before, as I haven't had anything like it since, but it was very scary at the time, especially for someone with haemophobia.

Later on we went to Woodberry so that I could at least have somewhere soft to sit in the car on the way there.  My hips were in so much pain from sitting on the floor all morning that I didn't even notice when I sat on a big file that David had dumped on my seat.  I did think "this seat feels harder than usual" and fortunately realised what I had done before I crushed it!

I spent the time while I was over there sitting on my coat on the bed frame in my bedroom (surprisingly, even that was more comfortable than the floor here in Grottsville) while I downloaded a couple more Barbie movies and watched a few episodes of Krypto the Superdog.  Yep, you all think I'm totally crazy now, don't you?  But the voice acting in that series is exceptional - I love Sam Vincent and Trevor Devall!  And the rest of them too, of course...  I didn't even recognise Kelly Sheridan as Mammoth Mutt.  And Tabitha is fantastic as ever.  Actually, even non-animation fans have got to enjoy Krypto - the superhero spin-offs are hilarious.

November 30th 2009

Just one builder showed up for work at Woodberry, and as the morning went on, he proclaimed himself "ill".  He was going hot and cold and showing all the signs of flu... and later began walking with a limp. (Not sure what connection that has to his other ailments.  But of course, he does know that we are scared of catching swine flu... or am I just being cynical?!)  Anyways, due to all of his mixed illnesses, he went home early.  David thought it was fine though, as it "might just be ordinary flu".  Well, that's a fat lot of good to us!  I don't want ANY flu while I feel like this and don't even have a bed to sleep in!

David promised to take us to Borders for their closing down sale in the evening, then came in too late for us to get there. >.<

I was still upset about being stuck in this house for another Christmas, so David decided to utter another of his very rare - but always ridiculous - suggestions.  "We can still have Christmas at Woodberry.  We can put the tree in my room - I'll get a carpet - and have all the things on the shelves."

A) How can he have a carpet when the builders still haven't even given him a price for sealing the gable cupboard in his room (which will create a lot of dust).

B) Why would we want the tree over there when we are existing in this dump?

"What things are you going to put on the shelves?" Mum asked.  "Presents!" David replied.  "What presents?  All we have for Desirée is one small bag of Lush stuff and we have nothing from anyone else or for each other." Mum pointed out.  David paused for a moment, obviously thinking on the spot, then answered, "I'm hoping to get other stuff!"  "Oh, are you really?!  Surely you're not going Christmas shopping in December?!  I'll be upset if you do!"  But not to worry, David didn't want to hurt Mum's feelings.  "I'll let you know that I'm going!" he said, defensively.  Um, I think Mum was talking about a little thing called swine flu which spreads through crowded places like wildfire, whether you tell her you're going out with all the crazed Christmas shoppers or not!

Ah, but all is well anyway.  David reckons his "swine flu jab must have worked because of the heat that kept running through his arm for days".

Emma decided to re-home the kittens with Justine's aunt (Justine being the friend whose husband bought the abused dog, Marley).  I just can't stand the way those people behave.  A pet is for life and you shouldn't bring one into your home without thinking it through and taking your responsibilities very seriously.  Enough said.

David and I went to Tesco late that night and discovered that the strawberry trifles that Mum and I love so much ARE still available, just on a different shelf.  Well, that says a lot for the knowledge (or honesty?) of the member of staff who told us an elaborate story about how they had been discontinued because people "didn't want strawberry trifles any more, and bought the desserts on that shelf instead".  Does he get a bonus for selling chocolate mousse?!

Oh, and finally, having almost totally forgotten, my MLP sticker album arrived.  There are a couple of loose stickers which are threatening to fall out and get lost but all in all I think it was pretty good for £1.99.

And look, there are even stickers depicting Truly and Lofty in there!  Rather handy for someone who's trying to collect any and all merchandise relating to those two ponies and didn't even know this book existed before seeing that one e-Bay auction, wouldn't you say?

December 1st 2009
Mum and I went for a walk up and down the road to post a couple of Christmas cards.  We're only returning the ones that people send to us this year - now we can see who our real friends are!

I was reported to an administrator on the MLP Trading Post for being uncommunicative with someone who bought some MLP stickers from me.  But as far as I know I have answered each and every one of her messages...?  Well, apart from the one she wrote to me saying words to the effect of "Okay, thanks." in response to her last crazy enquiry about why her package was taking so long.  What was I supposed to answer to that - "Thanks for your thanks regarding my message telling you that if you ask me for surface mail shipping, you can expect your parcel to take a lot longer than it would via airmail."?  It really stressed me though, as I would never dream of scamming anyone... I have a receipt to prove it was sent if she'd like me to send her a copy!  But no, she doesn't want that. >.<  She hasn't let me know if they've arrived - I guess I ought to write and ask her or I'll be accused of being uncommunicative again... But I'm guessing I would have heard from her again if she hadn't received them, and I'm almost scared to open up the can of worms all over again!

In the evening, David finally drove us to Borders for their "Up to 50% off closing down sale".  But it was crazily crowded in the shop, and we couldn't go inside and risk catching swine flu, of course, so we had to drive straight back with David complaining all the way about how Mum and I had stopped him getting any more books for himself.

I was particularly depressed about Christmas.  I didn't even have an advent calendar, and I do love opening my advent calendar(s?  The more the better!) every year and guessing what the pictures inside will be each day.  It's kind of become an annual tradition now.

December 2nd 2009
David went to the storage depot and brought the advent calendars back - after all, it was "only December 2nd".   I picked out a couple of cute ones that we must have bought in the January sales a couple of years back, probably when Mum was still struggling to give one to each of Emma's many children every year.

Mum hoovered the lounge and discovered that carpet beetles had eaten holes in the seat of her antique chair.  She was devestated.  Sure, we could get it re-upholestered, but her mum paid to have that done for her about twenty years ago and she's kept it nice for all these years, not allowing anyone but her Harrods teddy bear (who has also been eaten - but I think I mentioned that in a blog sometime ago) to sit on it, only for it to get ruined now.  And if we could have got out of this stupid house, it would still be okay.

We drove to Woodberry at about 10pm, and saw merrily Sickton strolling up the road towards his house.  Mum yelled at him again, and I swear he wavered and glanced briefly at the car.  What the heck was he doing out at that time of night anyway?  We see him practically every time we drive up that road.  I'm starting to wonder if he has three or four clones of himself who take it in turns to walk up and down on patrol outside his house at all hours!  Nah, I suppose some people just have a social life - nice for them, when they've stopped the likes of myself moving from Grottsville.  And who on Earth would want to socialise with Sickton anyway?

Of course, thanks to that creep, we had to return to Grottsville to sleep on the hard cold floor.  David had kindly done some online research and found a solution!  A piece of foam 6' long and 2cm thick.  They "only" cost £10 and will apparently keep us warm and protect our backs.  "The army use them, so they must be good - and you will be able to use them for a long time."  Um, excuse me?  How long are you intending on staying here?!  Foam is considered a delicacy by the very beetles that cause my allergies, so it's not exactly going to help my breathing!  And where do you intend on putting these things?  We don't HAVE 6' of carpet to roll them out on.  I have to sleep with my knees practically tucked under my chin since I'm surrounded by so much rubbish, and I know Mum has even less space and I used to sleep up this end of the room until David drooled on that patch of carpet as well as the communal bed.

Anyways, I think that's it.  At least I've finally got onto this month - can't be long before I catch up now!

Love you all!
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Friday, 18 December 2009

I slipped on the ice and 'broke' the computer today...

Current mood:  stressed
...But thankfully it turned out to be okay.  Well, thankfully for me anyway, but I guess you guys might not be so thankful since you'll now have to listen to me droning on about another four days of my boring life!

November 25th 2009

It was Allan's 8th birthday - I can't believe how fast the years have flown!  We didn't get to see him, of course, having dropped his presents off the previous weekend. Instead Mum and I went for another boring walk up and down the road in order to get some exercise.

Mum had a "creeping feeling" running up and down her legs, which she convinced herself must be "caused by thrombosis" and an aching foot which she was sure she "must have broken somehow".  Both have since mysteriously got better on their own though so I think both problems were most likely caused by sleeping on the floor.  My knees and hips kept clicking all day too - again, probably caused by not having a proper bed.

Someone dropped me a hint about a great e-Bay auction... an unused G1 MLP sticker album for £1.99 including P&P.  Not too bad, eh?  And amazingly I was the only bidder!  The description and photo were awful though, so it was a bit of a gamble, but I figured it was worth taking a risk for once.

And while I was on e-Bay, I finally bought myself a copy of the second Call of the Wild DVD.  It was released months ago, and I've been putting off buying it for a long time because Mum is always using e-Bay and would laugh at me for wasting my money, but she'd told me she wasn't going pony hunting this Christmas and I know she's out of money for buying anything for herself, so I decided to take the plunge.  I got it for under a fiver including shipping too, so don't feel too bad about it.

In the evening, David drove me to Woodberry - I got upset to see all the twinkling Christmas lights in Ealing Broadway and remember how we can't have so much as a tree this year because of the clutter and the fact that I'd be in danger of kicking it over on top of myself during the night.

When we got there, I discovered that the ponies I had taken over there to "save" from the heat in the back room in such a hurry - even though I really didn't want to be parted with them - were boiling hot anyway.  Basically, being winter again, the central heating had been turned on and it would seem that they were right above our boiler and just through the wall from the neighbours' hot water tank.  Of course, I moved them straight away but now Tall Tales has developed pony cancer as well.  What's the point of it all?

It also depressed me to see just how filthy my nice 'new' cream carpet is - the colour was totally different underneath the boxes.   And my wall was cracking behind the ponies where it's obviously far too hot - so much for Sickton insulating my room!

Mum was fuming when I told her about the ponies.  "I hope you kicked up stink, and showed David that you mean business!  I would have been kicking the wall down - bl**dy Mark and Sarah!"  (Mark and Sarah being our neighbours, by the way)  What good would it have done to kick the wall?  Make yet another dent in what should have been the nice room I've waited eighteen years for?  "Yes, why not?  The wardrobe's going there anyway!" came Mum's reply. o_0

November 26th 2009
Went to Tesco just before it shut - in fact, the doors were already closed but the security guard kindly let us in anyway.

I finally wrote to Trevor Devall and sent in a couple of (admittedly ridiculous) questions for Gary Chalk.  I have yet to listen to the episode and see if Trevor used either of them, but I'm so embarrassed that I kind of hope he didn't. >.<  I wish I could have come up with something original...

Caroline told me that she was going to Vancouver again for the weekend - not sure if you're reading this, but I am still so jealous!  And still waiting for photos.

I'm still concerned about all this swine flu.  Apparently, there has been a very low uptake on the jab in this country, and they destroy all the stuff that isn't used at one of the special 'swine flu party clinics where only the sick and elderly are invited' (as I have named them!) since they can't keep it as long as other vaccines.  Fair enough.  BUT if one of the old cronies then decides that they WANT a vaccine, they will be provided with one, meaning someone else won't get the chance. >.<

There were over 30 deaths just in this country that week - it's worrying when I am still sleeping on the floor and have all these bad congestion problems.

November 27th 2009

David "didn't have time" to do anything towards moving house all week.  He didn't even ring the builders to see if they could come the next day.  Mum and I knew that this job would take over... so why didn't he make more effort to get us out of here BEFORE he started work?!

We had tomato soup for dinner... and once again, Mum gave me way too much and it spilled all over the carpet. (At least I'd put it down so that it didn't burn my thumb this time!)  Then she told me that it was my own fault as I "want to use a baby's plate".  I most certainly do not want to use the plastic snail plate that I have been using since I was seven, but in this house normal things like kitchenware are banned, so I don't have an ordinary plate to use!

In the evening, I went to Woodberry via David's office where he had to pick up a file.  He works in the most peculiar place - it's like an unused storage depot with three or four rooms knocked into one.  One of his co-workers had Cute Curtsey and Willow Wisp next to his desk (presumably they belong to his daughter?) which I thought was sweet.

I watched Barbie and the Magic of Pegasus - oh, what an exciting life I lead! - and must say that Lalainia Lindbjerg's Brietta does sound very much like Clover from My Little Pony Tales.  Kelly Sheridan said she thought Lalainia had played Clover, so I wonder if she was right about Patch having been voice by Brigitta Dau and not Venus Terzo after all?

And finally, Emma wrote Mum a message offering her a dog, which one of her friends had "rescued" from a fellow common council estate inhabitant.

Have a question how do you feel about Newfoundland / alasation cross dog 5 months, micro chipped, fully vac until July next year, male lovely so clam ????? he's your's if you want him he's been saved by Justine's husband - he saw him being beaten over the head and brought him off the bloke to get him away to somewhere safe but they can't keep him cause of the cat- still not over Boyce!"

 (Boyce was Justine's old dog who she got rid of because he nipped her husband when he tried to interfere with a fight between Boyce and their cat, hence poor old Boyce was "a danger to children". )

I can't imagine what she was thinking of.  She knows that Mum won't even let me have guinea pigs because she wants to be free to go on holiday and we have nobody to babysit any pets while we go away, and she also knows that we are living in what can only be called a slum.  How the heck could we have a previously-abused huge great Newfoundland/Alsatian sleeping on the floor with us?!  There's not even enough floor space for a dog as it stands right now.

So I think it was a bit cruel to say it to Mum knowing how much she wants another dog, and how guilty it would make her feel that she wasn't taking on the needy creature.

November 28th 2009
Didn't leave the house all day.  I'm sick of this lack of independence as I am fast approaching twenty years old.  Well, okay, I still have seventeen months until that, but you get my meaning.

David went to Woodberry but only one builder showed up and seems to have spent his day doing next to nothing.  He gave us two out of three receipts, but we still have nothing for the snagging as he "needs to get someone else to look at it first".

Oh, and Emma's animal-related nonsense continued.
"I don't know the whole story but the dog was tied to a bed and if he made a noise the man hit him, Rick saw him being hit and asked what he'd done saying he'd been looking for a dog like Marley so the man said you can have him if you want he's nothing but trouble, so rick did a deal, i think there must have been a lot more to it than that but i didn't go in to details - Justine would keep him but she plans to go back to work and doesn't want to leave him all though the day plus her last dog Boyce used to bully the cat (Mac) and Mac is so scared of dogs now and Marley who i met last night is 3 times the size of Boyce so Mac won't come in and Justine say's she has to put Mac first.
The problem Justine has got is Rick got him off this bloke thought work - and if she takes him to PDSA, RSPCA, Battersea or the likes he's mirco chipped and when they see his poor head they will have to explain why and it will come back at work on Rick. Rick is just pleased he got him out of there.

We are thinking of re homing the cats - they are more work than they are worth don't get me wrong they are nice cats but Nick and i haven't bonded with them the kids only like Lucy, they are covered in fleas no matter now much we treat them, we don't really have the money for them they need to be done and i'm scared that when they start to go out they will come home and i'll have a huge vet's bill from where another cat has got them! i said to the kids today how would they feel about getting rid of them expe`cting tears etc and nothing they said yeah ok!"

I am just astounded.  Whoever mistreated that poor dog should be reported, no question about it.  While do-gooders continue to just buy individual animals off of [Insert rude name here] said un-named 'rude name' people will continue to buy more animals and abuse them instead.  He NEEDS to be reported for what he did.

And as for those poor, poor cats...!  Fair enough, they do need to get out of that house with the kids pulling them around, but Emma should have considered her financial situation before taking them on.  And if she's really so broke as to not be able to afford two kittens, how does she propose to keep the latest child?!  The fact is, you can't just take animals on a whim and play a game of pass the parcel with them once you get bored.  They are living breathing creatures, and deserve to be treated with some respect.  And she's not even doing the semi-responsible thing of sending them to a (non-euthanising) re-homing centre where they will be assessed and sent to the best home for them.  She just intends on passing them on to the next friend or relative until the novelty wears off for them too.  And how long before they end up with someone who won't even bother to pass them on and so the poor things will be drowned or meet some other horrific fate just because their latest owner couldn't be bothered with feeding them anymore?

And to sound almost proud that your kids don't care about getting rid of their pets?  Wow.  Just wow.  How can anyone feel good about bringing up their kids to think that way?  I honestly don't know if I will be able to hold my tongue when we see them on Boxing Day.

Well, time for me to get some sleep.  Arrivederci!

Desirée Skylark  xxx

Thursday, 17 December 2009

It's snowing...

Current mood:  distractable

...and, my goodness, it's cold!  I would go as far as to say this is the coldest winter I have ever known - perhaps we are entering a new Ice Age?!  They say there have been colder winters since I was born though, so presumably I just don't remember them.  I'm sitting here wearing a jumper over my t-shirt though, and believe me, that's something you don't see very often!

Anyone else feeling chilly?  Come along and snuggle around the fire then - I have even more dull stories of my life to share!

November 21st 2009

Didn't leave the house AGAIN - fourth day running!  Yay - this is already sounding like a fantastically interesting blog, isn't it?!

I had a nice long bath to cheer myself up and used half of my Lush Mr Butterball bath ballistic which Emma gave me for Christmas last year.  I had been saving it to use after we moved house, but I figured he was going soft anyway, so I might as well cheer myself up with a relaxing soak.  I swear by Lush products - it made my skin so soft which is saying something with all my eczema problems.

David had cancelled the bloke who was supposed to be coming to connect broadband in this house so as to go to Woodberry and supervise the builders.  But they sent him a text to say that they had "decided to have a day off"... no doubt to get him back for wasting their time two days previously.  Of course, David started ranting at us how he "would have been happy to leave them there at 1pm on Thursday anyway - we caused the trouble".  Well, I'm sure he would have been happy to leave them there.  He's not the one with a valuable collection of ponies being stored there on a certain idiotic man's advice!

Mum dreamed that she felt a mouse biting her thumb... at least she thought it was a dream.  But halfway through eating my breakfast that morning, I discovered a squashed mouse dropping on the bottom of my tray.  I can only presume it got there when I placed my tray on the floor... but it was certainly fresh.  Great - really makes me feel good about sleeping on the floor, even if my allergies were no problem.

But my allergies ARE a problem - they were worse than ever that day, and even attempting to sing made me cough.  But David says that I am causing trouble by wanting to move house.  "She won't stay here, so what can we do?  If she'd go out from here there'd be no problem."  Excuse me!  Can't anyone even recognise how my voice and my breathing are deteriorating?  It's not just a case of me refusing to go out alone from this house, it's a physical health problem.

I watched the last part of Barbie's Princess and the Pauper movie, and was pleasantly surprised to see the credits and find that I was pretty accurate when it came to figuring out who played which voice.  After listening to the movie, I decided to take a look at Kelly Sheridan's Twitter account and saw that she has to have orthodontic braces fitted and is (quite understandably) concerned about how they might affect her voice.  I can fully sympathise as that is my main concern when it finally comes to getting my orthodontic treatment, and I'm not even a professional voice actress.  I wrote her a note on Facebook which she seemed to appreciate.  It's highly unlikely that she'll ever see this, but hey, if by chance you ever do read this Kelly, I'm wishing you all the good luck in the world.

November 22nd 2009
We overslept badly.  I was the one who woke up first and got my parents up at 9.45am... by the time David had been in the bathroom, we didn't get out until almost 1pm.

We went to Emma's house to deliver Allan's 8th birthday gifts.  As we arrived, Emma announced that she and Nick were taking Abigale to a birthday party and said, "You don't mind looking after the other three, do you?!" closing the door behind her. 

Mum and I actually had quite a nice time, looking after the beasts... um, I mean children.  Don't I?

Well, okay, I'm not sure if that one on the end is a child or not.  But I've never thought boys were 100% human.  Perhaps these are better pictures of them.

We made sand pictures, watched Allan playing computer games, played follow my leader and watched various videos.  After a while the kids became restless, but fortunately Mum had a trick up her sleeve.  A magic trick, that is.

"ORDER!  ORDER!" she shouted at them.  "I AM YOUR TEACHER, AND I ORDER ALL OF YOU TO SIT IN A ROW!"  Magically, all of the kids dropped to the floor in a way I've never seen them do before.  "I am the great Jacqueline and this is my assistant Skylark.  Today I am going to show you how to climb through a small piece of paper.  Look, you see this piece of paper here?"

"I will just make a few cuts in this piece of paper and make a hole big enough for you to step right through!"  Mum began snipping away and we all watched with fascination.  "Does she really do it?" Allan asked me.  "Oh, yes!" I said, remembering how Mum had often performed the trick in the past.

Soon, Mum's work was complete and she held up... a Chinese lantern.  She tried again and came up with... a paper chain.  Um... she had forgotten how to do the trick!  But the kids were still enthralled by her Christmas decorations, and Mum saved the day by having my old teddy bear stacking toys (which we had given to the kids, as shown in the picture with Allan) 'walk' through the paper chain and claiming that the teddies were the kids.

Well, better luck next time, eh?  We will have to do some research as to how to do the trick properly before Boxing Day.

My congestion troubles completely cleared up over there, allowing me to sing in perfect tune with Sleeping Beauty when Abigale returned, and proving it must be an allergy caused by something in this house.  Abigale and I also played with her ponies (and my Star Song, who I had taken over there to play along with them) - they went to a 'birthday party' just like the one Abigale had been to that afternon.  She had got a new Dolly Mix Star Song and Ponyville Cheerilee since we had last visited, and we had some great fun.  I miss the good old days of being a kid and actually playing with my ponies, so it's good to have the excuse of playing along with the kids once in a while!

It was nice to see the kittens again too, but it pained me to see them being dragged around by the kids.  Kizzy brought Lucy up to the bedroom and the kids were chasing her around and around.  The poor thing did all she could to escape - going under the bed, attempting to open the wardrobe to get in there etc. - and in the end she just curled up in a ball in front of the TV, shaking nervously.  I can't believe that the kids are allowed to get away with so much without being told off.  I certainly had a go at them when I saw what they were doing.  Lucy had a torn ear which Kizzy proudly told me she had caused by "chasing her under a radiator".  Nice.  Libby really didn't want me to leave at the end.  As I went to get up, she put her paws on my knee and stared into my eyes, desperately wanting to just curl up on my lap.  Poor little things.

November 23rd 2009

David "forgot to ring the builders" to tell them he couldn't make it to the house, but they didn't show up anyway and said they would come the following saturday instead. >.<

David spent the day in Greenford, watching people working on the railway.  He somehow managed to trip over and twist his ankle.  Hence, he had to sit down at the top of the stairs and I didn't leave the house all day again - the fifth day in six.  What a life.  However, he hadn't felt too bad to go to Woodberry himself on the way back from work to see an electrician about the fizzing lights in the extension.  Two and a half hours later the lights work again in the extension... but the bloke had to make a big hole in the wall around the switch so of course that needs re-plastering, and ALL of the smoke alarms need to be replaced as they had been wired wrongly and somehow connected to the lights in the extension.  Another mistake made by Sickton's builders and yet there's seemingly no way to get our money back.  The laws of this country are a pain in the behind.

November 24th 2009
Mum was too depressed to get up until 10.45am, which meant that I couldn't get up either as there wasn't even a place on the floor where I could sit in the dark.  And by the time I was able to get up I was terribly congested and just couldn't clear my airways at all.

Mum and I went for a walk to post a letter - well, it was an excuse to leave the house anyway, but such a boring walk.  A bloke asked us for directions, and we sent him the wrong way.  Not intentionally, I must add!  Mum and I just don't know the street names around here as we've always hated the place too much to bother to get to know it.  Honestly, I could probably give you better directions in Los Angeles or Vancouver, because I've studied maps until I know all the street names over there like the back of my hand!

The builders had claimed that they would come and hand over the signed receipts the following day, but suddenly changed their minds.  David didn't even deem this worthy of being mentioned so we had to ask him in order to find out what was happening.

As far as he is concerned, we didn't leave the house all day again (we didn't tell him that we had gone for a boring walk around the block) and he just doesn't care at all about our health, either physically or mentally.  In fact, he went and got his dinner and shouted at Mum when she dared to disturb him by reminding him that he had promised to take us to Borders to buy her Wanderlust magazine.  The new issue was out the following day, so it was her last chance to get a copy.  I'm sick of living here and having no independence.

Well, that's about it for those four days.  We're getting there... shouldn't be long before I finally catch up now!

Love you all!
Desirée Skylark  xxx

Another disaster involving Woodberry occurred today...

Current mood:  scared
...And now it's really looking as though we won't be able to move house.  I am thoroughly depressed but perhaps a bit of blogging will help to take my mind off things.

November 17th 2009

Mum and I looked through the other people's Christmas presents and sorted out some junk for everyone, mainly unwanted gifts from last year.  Aah, the sweet genorous feeling that comes with the holiday season!

The roofing men came to fix our leaking roof here in Grottsville, although I'm not sure how much work they actually did.  They spent about forty minutes in the back garden smoking (and dropping their dog ends all over our patio), then put a ladder up at the front of the house - causing me to move away from the window as the horrible shifty-looking builder kept looking into our lounge - climbed up on the roof for about ten minutes, made a few hammering noises... and left.  And I went dizzy standing up for those ten minutes.  I think it's just severe stress levels, but it scares me when that happens.

David suddenly rang Mum to tell him that she had "deceived him about my education".  Um... that's kind of random, isn't it?  And how can she have deceived him.  He knew we had no school books and that there were so secondary school age TV shows, so how did he think I was being educated, especially since Mum left school herself at 14?  Perhaps if he'd shown more interest in me he would have known that I wasn't being educated.

He took me to Woodberry at 8pm to use the broadband internet connection... then he kept the computer himself until 9.15, and Mum was cross that I didn't leave until 10pm.  She was "pleased she hadn't gone - she didn't think I'd be that long!"  What?!  She didn't think I'D be that long?  David spent more time online than me!

David spent the evening laughing at the most revolting comedy.  Don't ask me what it was, but it was full of bad actors with very common English accents.  David was particularly taken with a part that featured a man eating some delicacy and swallowing his tooth along with it... which he then proceeded to cough up and hold out in his hand.  It made me feel totally sick, and David kept playing and re-playing the same scene.  "Why do you have to keep playing it again and again?" I said as David laughed at the fifth showing.  "Well, I don't get to see it again and again, do I?" David sneered, complaining that I was making too much noise and playing the scene yet again.  Needless to say, I had one of those horrible nightmares about losing all your teeth that night!

The builders rang and asked when they could start work again.  But now that David is at work he can't get there to supervise them.  They could have come at the weekend, but David had arranged for a bloke to come and set up a broadband connection in THIS house that saturday.  Where's his sense of priority, and how long are we going to be stuck in this dump anyway?!

November 18th 2009

I was locked up all day again.  It's like a prison in this house, being unable to go out when you want.  And it's horrid to not even have so much as a bed or a chair to sit on.

David met the builders at Woodberry and agreed to see them the following day when he was supposed to go and have his swine flu jab.  So he would have to take an unpaid day off work (since it was no longer for medical reasons).  We always said we wouldn't supervise the builders and he said there would be no need.  But his whole mood changed at this point, just because he had forgotten his swine flu jab when he agreed to see them.  "Stuff you, if you won't get off your *sses, I'll leave your stuff over there with them!"  I only agreed to take my stuff over there because you said that you would always be there to supervise them, so there's no need to be nasty towards me now!

I had an awful headache and congestion problems, obviously caused by these blasted allergies, but apparently David is a record and his needle is well and truly stuck.  "GO TO A DOCTOR!"  How about getting out of this house and away from these carpet beetles?!  He also told me to "take my breakfast to Woodberry" the next day so that I could supervise the builders.  He doesn't seem to understand that I need an hour in the bathroom to clear all this muck out of my throat before I eat anything at all. >.<

Mum was "definitely not moving to Woodberry" again anyway.  "Your allergies are a nuisance," she said.  "I'm quite happy to just stay here."  Good for her.  But they should have thought about that when they had a kid miles away from a school, never sent it to school anyway and then left it with no way of getting further education.  It might have been good to consider if you were going to be able to provide the kid with a bed before you brought it into the world, too.

I spent the whole day trying to figure out how I could get out of here, but the whole thing is just a huge vicious circle.  I have no money, and that will never change while I have no job.  But I can't get a well-paid job without an education, and I can't afford an education without money!  As for emigrating, there's no way I can get to Canada without a decent qualification which in turn means education and money.  *Sighs*

That's why I would have loved the chance to study in Vancouver.  I mentioned this to Mum, and she blew up on me.  "It would have only been a temporary solution, and couldn't be considered 'getting out' - and a theatre degree is not a proper qualification for a proper job anyway!"  Well, okay, perhaps acting is not a stable office job, and it is indeed highly unlikely I'd ever make it full time.  But it would have been good to get to study something I enjoyed and just give it a go.  Also, it would at least have given me a taste of living abroad and allowed me to see if I could adapt.  I mean, even if I was a multi-millionaire with the best job in the world, I wouldn't just book my flights and leave without checking out the place beforehand.

I recorded some instrumental musical tunes (which I had downloaded while I was at Woodberry) to cassette but I can't sing with all these congestion problems.  Mum calls it a "physical inability to sing", but I object.  I can hit the notes, even without ever taken a singing lesson and being totally unable to read music so doing it all by ear.  My problem comes with breathing, mainly caused by these stupid allergies.

November 19th 2009

David went to Woodberry, and supposedly waited for the builders to show up before telling them that they couldn't work that day.  No wonder they're fed up with him!  They didn't bring the receipts with them anyway - apparently they are "getting another bloke to sign them after he has typed up a copy for himself".

Freddie's tile arrived, but is nowhere near the correct glaze for the fireplace so the restoration work seems totally hopeless too.

David went to work as normal and just came back to get his swine flu jab in the early afternoon.  He was made to sit in the waiting room for ten minutes but fortunately didn't have any bad reactions.  They said that Mum and I wouldn't get our jabs until well into next year.  So much for this country being well prepared!

While he was back here, he weighed a couple of books I was trying to sell.  The total cost of the books was £3.50, but shipping to the US would have cost almost £12!  So there's another lost sale, simply based on Royal Mail's ridiculous prices.

I didn't leave the house for the second day running.  It's truly awful, especially with my allergies getting worse and worse the longer I'm cooped up in here.  I tried to make some recordings, but my breathing is horrendous - I sent one of the recordings to a couple of people and both of them picked up on my rattly throat.

Meanwhile, Mum was still ranting about my allergies being a nuisance, since she could stay in this house if not for them...  Huh!  Believe me, they're far more of a nuisance to those who actually have to endure them.

November 20th 2009
Didn't leave the house AGAIN!  Basically, David's job had taken over just as Mum and I predicted and he was always too tired to be bothered with taking us out in the evenings.

I was re-watching (or should I say re-listening to, since I can't have the TV picture on while Mum has to sit opposite it?) the second season of Intelligence when David announced that he wanted to watch Children in Need.  Why?  We're practically living in poverty ourselves - too bad I'm not under eighteen, perhaps they'd donate some money towards getting me to a place with a bed?!

I had such an awful backache from sleeping on the floor that I could hardly walk and didn't feel up to having a bath.  And yet I knew that if I didn't soak in Lush prodcuts before I saw Emma on Sunday, she would say that I stank.  Well, it's not surprising when I live and sleep on this filthy floor, is it?

Ooh, and last but certainly not least, Janyse won the Contemporary Christian category at the Hollywood Music in Media Awards with her song, 'This Day Is Mine' (I think it's still my profile song actually?)  Congratulations, Janyse!  A very well-deserved award indeed!

Anyways, it's 1.15am Mum is snoring on the sofa (while David is still out at work!) so I guess I ought to get to floor-bed.  Still, we're getting near to catching up now.

Same time tomorrow, right?  Well, hopefully a bit earlier actually!

Desirée Skylark  xxx

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

Happy Birthday, Liz!

Current mood:  drained

Happy Sweet Sixteenth, Elisabeth!  Hope you've had a great day!

November 13th 2009

David went to work early and came back at 9am to take us to Brent Cross.  We popped into TKMaxx, but couldn't find any more of the trousers I'm looking for.  Then we were supposed to go to Lakeland, but David had refused to discuss what we were buying beforehand, so we only knew we wanted a cutlery drawer divider which cost £17.50, and we needed to spend £20 to use our £5 discount voucher.  So we sat in the car for a while and tried to figure out what to buy to make the total more than £20.  David's answer was to "buy some toasted sandwich bags" .  Mum has wanted a toaster with a wide enough slot to make toasted sandwiches for YEARS, and has waited patiently to move house and get a new one.  And now her teeth aren't good enough to eat toast most of the time.  "You know that I can't eat toast any more," she said.  "Yes, but I can." David sneered.  "And when you get dentures you'll be able to eat it again too."  Charming.  Mum was quite understandably upset by this remark and refused to go in Lakeland, so we went across the road to the main shopping centre which opens at 10am.

Despite most of the shops not even being open yet, the place was horrendously crowded and full of people who kept coughing and sneezing.  Christmas shopping starts stupidly early these days, it would appear.  Mum, already in a bad mood, refused to wait for ELC to open so that we could buy Gabriella's Christmas gift, shouted rather loudly about swine flu, turned around and left.

David received a letter about the Dorothy Perkins credit card he signed up for when he bought the expensive trousers there (he got a small discount for getting a card that day, so long as he remembered to cancel it later).  I loved the wording though, obviously intended for all the female shoppers out there.  "Please sign this card and put it in your purse, David!"

Oh, and the doctors' surgery wrote and offered David a swine flu jab.  Of course, I'm pleased for him and since he's the one at work mixing with people it helps Mum and I too in the long run if it might reduce his chances of bringing it back to us.  But I wish I could have one while I have all of these awful allergies and congestion problems.

David turned it on me, of course, saying that "she should have gone to see a doctor about her allergies then, shouldn't she?  Then she'd have been on medication."  Um... not the sort of medication I'd need to be taking to qualify for a vaccination. >.<

Then in the evening he had another argument with me on the subject and stormed off to Woodberry on his own, just because I dared to say that I thought flu would kill me if I got it while I'm so congested and feel so ill anyway, and have no bed.  "YOU'RE NOT GOING TO DIE!" He yelled at me.  "This is all your fault, Jacqui.  You put it in her head."  Excuse me?  Don't I have a brain of my own then?  I'm sorry, but when I'm sitting here with so much muck in my throat that I hear a rattling noise every time I take a deep breath and I feel so weak from never getting any sleep on the floor, I do worry about getting flu.  Ordinary flu always hits me hard even back when I was healthier than I am now.

I guess the fact it was *that* time of the month and I was feeling horrible anyway wasn't helping with my mood.  I hate sleeping on the floor at that time anyway, because it usually means that I have to get up in the middle of the night and carry heavy buckets to our non-flushing downstairs toilet (sorry, if that's too much information!), but on top of all of that I had really awful shooting pains and my hormones were going crazy.  I kept breaking down over absolutely everything and yelling at inanimate objects.  Well, okay, that's how I am all the time, but it was a whole lot worse that week. >.<

November 14th 2009

David spent FIVE HOURS in the bathroom (he's proved he doesn't need that long in there on work days, he just thinks that the weekend is his to waste) so we didn't leave the house all day and no more stuff from the storage depot got taken to Woodberry to be checked for damage in time for the insurance claim.

My package from Airiel arrived though, which certainly cheered me up.  She sent the sweetest little message along with these two girls as if it was written by the ponies themselves, and I thought it was so nice of her to let me have them for the cost of shipping.  Anyways, enough chatter, meet the two newest members of my herd.

Halloween 2008 Star Song and Scootaloo!

Scootaloo's flower looks rather silly, and the plastic has stained them a little just from sitting in their boxes for so long, but I love them to bits!  I was so sad when I missed these two girls.  I'd love to get all of the Holiday G3s eventually.

It would have been Grandma's 83rd birthday and Mum's cousin Katie sent a bunch of freesias and roses in her memory - Mum hates arranging flowers, but she put the freesias in a vase next to Grandma's urn anyway.  She wanted to take the roses to her grandad's grave but as I already mentioned David didn't take us out all day so they ended up in the bin.  What a terrible waste.

The light in the utility room popped, plunging the kitchen into total darkness.  So David had to dash off to get a replacement and fumble around to change the light strip.  I'm sick of living like this.  It meant we ended up with a very late dinner since we couldn't do anything in the kitchen until the light was replaced.  David sulked, and said he never gets any dinner anyway, because "my drink is always out there and I don't like being moved off of the floor as I'm always listening to something through my headphones".  True enough, I'm wearing headphones even now, but I'm more than happy to move my drink any time (it has to be moved because he always manages to cover it in grease from his meat, which isn't very nice for a vegetarian!)  He just talks such a lot of nonsense.

While he was sulking, he decided to have another dig at me as regards going to the doctor about my allergies...sorry, I mean my 'something else'.  After all, "Who says it's an allergy, he thinks it's something worse than that.  The fact that I have no bed can't make me ill."  He loves to scare me, but my problems always get a lot better when I'm out of this house, so I'm sure it's an allergy caused by something in this dump, probably the carpet beetles.  As for his last comment, do you think someone's feeling guilty?  And of course not having a bed makes you run down and susceptible to catch anything.

November 15th 2009

I had to get up to use the loo again and disturbed Mum by cursing when I slopped a load of water out of the bucket onto my foot.  So we all overslept - another reason we shouldn't both be sleeping on the same floor.  Everyone deserves a room that they can retreat to for a bit of peace.

When I did wake up, I had strained my neck, had an awful backache and a stabbing pain in the back of my head.  I just don't know how much longer I can sleep on the floor without literally falling apart.

We went to the storage depot, but can't find Mum's cruet collection or her big teddy bear Cuthbert.  They just seem to have mysteriously disappeared, but until we get all of the furniture out of the room, we can't tell for sure.  We did find that special stuff we had put in the drawer at the bottom of the wardrobe that Ron's father made had been REMOVED and stuffed behind a shelving unit on the other side of the room.  And we have no clue what's happened to the key to the wardrobe which was also in the drawer... we fear it too will have been moved, but we can't even check inside the drawer until we can move the wardrobe out of there.

Then we took the 'other people's presents' boxes to Woodberry to sort through, and David hogged all the time on the computer so I didn't get a chance to do any of my jobs.  Apparently he was setting up a second e-Bay account so that Mum could look for secret Christmas gifts for me, but I don't see much point since she has no list of ponies (hence no clue what I have and haven't got), it was mid-November so rather late to start looking, and we're still in this dump with no way of having so much as a Christmas tree this year.

Mum actually pointed this out to him.  "Where can we put a tree?" she asked him.  "Let her have it in the bathroom!" came back David's bright answer.  Merry Christmas, one and all!  David might love the bathroom enough to spend five hours in there at a time, but it's not really a place I want to celebrate Christmas, thank you very much.

Then we saw Sickton and his kids cycling past with huge grins on their faces and I wanted to push them all off of their bikes.  Why should they be having happy lives when they've totally messed up mine?!

That night we went for a drive to Feltham to put a letter through the roofers' door, and had to endure awful hymns all the way there and back.  David actually stopped outside a petrol station and refused to go in until one of them had finished.  My favourite radio show just began as we arrived back in Grottsville.  Just my luck.  And the central heating in that car dries up my nose and throat and makes me feel even worse.  Actually, I can't stand central heating in any form - it always renders me unable to breathe.

Mum managed to find a CD on e-Bay of a singer she saw on 'This Morning' a few years ago.  By chance, I found the recording I must have made of the show that day, and we finally found out that the name of the bloke was Matt DUSK and not Matt BUDD as Mum had been looking for.  No wonder we couldn't find him!  The CD only cost £3.49 including P&P which was a plus.

November 16th 2009

Didn't leave the house all day.  (Can't you just tell we're up for a fascinating entry here?!)  David was "too tired" to go anywhere when he got back from work, so I couldn't even check my ponies at Woodberry again.  Then he went off to Tesco on his own without offering me the chance to go with him again.

Actually, David was just irritating me in general.  He continuously uses my second tape player/recorder (which I use for making recordings of several characters until I can use proper computer equipment) as a radio and leaves it running even when he goes in the bathroom or goes out.  Now he's totally worn it out, and it's playing everything at roughly half its normal speed, so I can no longer use it for my purposes.  And on top of that, he kept hanging all his clothes on the top of the door to the old communal bedroom which doubles as the only room I can use to make recordings.  It's just totally impossible to do anything as far as voice acting goes, especially when the extension lead keeps falling out of my other tape recorder and I have no instrumental music recordings anyway since I can't get everything off of the internet while I'm stuck with dial up.

Ugh, you don't even want to hear the rest of the notes for the 16th.  Basically, I was highly depressed, Mum and I had decided we didn't want to move to Woodberry, and I couldn't see any way out... Blah, blah, blah... Does anything ever change?  Will anything ever change?

Find out in the next episode of Desirée Skylark's blog!  xxx

Monday, 14 December 2009

I need to know these answers, I need to find my way... Seize my tomorrow, learn my yesterday.

Current mood:  tired

Okay, I admit it.  I'm running out of ideas for titles, so the latest is some lyrics from the latest Barbie movie I've been watching. >.<  Yes, sounds silly, I know, but they are actually pretty good movies considering their main purpose is to sell toys, and most of the voice actors are fantastic.  I am really growing to love Alessandro Juliani's voice.  I should watch Death Note some time...

November 9th 2009

David started work, and travelled by bus (due to the fact that he had to pick up the company car) and left us feeling miserable, housebound and terrified of him catching swine flu and bringing it back to us.  David claimed there was "only one school kid on the bus" but I find that hard to believe.

Just as we had predicted, David had no time to ring anybody so no progress was made towards moving house whatsoever.

In the evening, we went to Brent Cross TRU to return the Ben 10 car.  I was very tempted to buy another 'Alien G3.5 pony' or two, but decided against it in the end when the Christmas staff kept on pestering me and asking if I needed any help.  They should realise that they're coming across as overpowering and actually losing sales for TRU.  For God's sake, I politely told you that I was just looking and you ask me again less than a minute later?!

Then we drove through Kilburn to put a letter through the lawyer's door (I didn't even like being in the car in that area - I felt like someone was going to shoot me at any minute!) then to Woodberry to check my ponies and pick up the hoover.

David suddenly very calmly announced that his last employers still owe him £10,000 in tax and he has to chase them for it.  God help us.  We know how useless he is at chasing anyone.  And he doesn't even seem particularly bothered about them getting away with it.

Mum read a news story that under 21s at college or university may qualify for a swine flu jab, and David blew up at me.  "Why didn't you enrol at a college and just never go?"  WTH?  Why would I have even thought to enrol at a college if I had no intention of going?  I was waiting to move house so that I could enrol properly, thank you very much.  That man speaks so much nonsense at times!

November 10th 2009
David had moved the hire car in front of the lounge window the previous night so as to get the new company car into the garden, and in so doing had blocked out the little bit of light that we do get in this horrid dark cave of a house.  Nice.  Thank you for being so considerate (not).

I was stuck in all day, and didn't even get to go to Woodberry to check my ponies.  And David went to Tesco without even offering me the chance to go with him.  And we couldn't have any tea until 12.15am when he came back from the supermarket and had finished in the kitchen getting his own.

  Mum cheered me up by presenting me with my belated 18th birthday gift.

It's a really beautiful guinea pig necklace.  It made me kind of sad since I can't have guinea pigs any more, but it's still a nice unusual piece of jewellery and in fact the only jewellery I have that I would label as too expensive for every day.

David attempted to ring his old employers but found that he had left it so long that the company had folded, so presumably he has to pay the £10,000 himself.  Why does he never sort anything out?  We've lost so much money through his laziness.

He didn't do anything towards the Woodberry effort again either.  And we desperately needed to move to a house with beds with him out and about with all the flu carriers on a daily basis.  His answer?  "Go and sleep on the 'wooden bed' (the fitted bed in Emma's old bedroom), then you can have a doctor in if you get swine flu."  Great.  I'll go and sleep on a bed below a ceiling he has always said leaks (the reason I've never had a bedroom, don't you know?) surrounded by so many stacks of rubbish that a doctor couldn't even get to the bed, and we can stay here forever.  Never mind the fact that my allergies would be no better up there anyway, since we have just as many carpet beetles in that room as downstairs.

November 11th 2009
Mum went to see her useless dentist regarding the tooth with the 'flying crown', fully expecting her not to do anything about it, as her dentist only ever gives out antibiotics or refers her elsewhere.  So David and I left her there and went to Woodberry to let a the roofing bloke in to fix the leaking rooflight.

I walked up to the charity shops around the corner while David waited for the bloke to arrive.  There were no ponies to be found, and my poor Morning Glory keyring lost one of her eye jewels somewhere along the way.  I felt really guilty afterwards, even if she is only a plastic pony!  Needless to say, she has now retired, and loves to give me a disapproving look with her one twinkling eye from the top of the bookcase at the end of the lounge.
We locked the roofing bloke out in the garden (having given him a key to the alley so that he could get around the back), then went back to Ealing Broadway to collect Mum from the dentist.  The dentist had surprised her by removing a large chunk of the tooth... but she has to have the roots removed by a surgeon in January.  Ouch!

Despite her mouth full of cotton wool, we still walked through the parks (via the Fara Kids' Charity Shop, but again, no ponies whatsoever) to Woodberry, where I photographed some ponies and downloaded some more stuff from Youtube.

Then David picked us up after work and took us back to Grottsville, forcing us to listen to the very loud car radio all about unemployed young people and teenagers' education/work options etc.  How insensitive can you get?

I received a form to fill in if I wished to get postal votes from now on (thanks to that idiot from the council enforcing putting my name up on the electoral roll).  Well, stuff it.  I just chucked it out.  This country's on a downward spiral, and I see no way that the best government in the world could save us.  Let them mess it up on their own, I say.  Better yet, it was sent to MRS Desirée Alder.  I guess it was just a missprint, but what an insult!  I shall remain MISS for the rest of my life if I can possibly help it, thank you very much for nothing.

Grace spoke to me on MSN (which I had spent several hours upgrading with dial up a couple of days previously) and David took the opportunity to sneak into the bathroom, meaning that I couldn't go and get changed for bed.  "He's going to yell at me for calling him out now," I moaned.  "Well, I don't blame him really." Mum said.  Well, sorry, but perhaps he should have got us into a better situation before he started work, so that he wasn't sleeping on the BATHROOM FLOOR.  Then we could all go to bed (yes, a proper bed!  Wouldn't that be a novelty?!) when we chose.  And I might be more inclined to go to bed earlier if I had a reason to get up early in the mornings (ie college) and wasn't sleeping on a floor with the very beetles that cause my allergies crawling all over me.

But then it would appear that Mum didn't support moving house herself.  "I vote we don't move there after an uncomfortable afternoon on the floor and her wanting to go back."  Um...
A) You wouldn't BE on the floor if we were living there and had furniture in the house.
B) Why does me wanting to go back to use the broadband connection one afternoon affect you moving over there?
C) You know that if we don't move there, you and David will argue forever about where else to move and so we'll end up staying here.  And I don't see how any of us can survive here much longer...

November 12th 2009

David had complained about "another cereal box full of rubbish" that had been dumped in the garden the previous day, and got to throw it out over the road.  I had thought that it looked like a pizza box myself, but that's not the point...
On the morning of the 12th, I looked out of the window and saw a toy chef looking back at me.  Mum couldn't stand to see him out in the wet leaves and went and fetched him indoors.  We did a bit of research in toy catalogues and found out that he was part of a TRU game called "Poppa's Pizza Topple".  When Mum went back in the garden she discovered a lot of the other accessories for the game too - all kinds of plastic pizza toppings and a dice.  All were in really nice condition too, except that they appeared to be covered in some kind of cooking fat. o_0

I now realised that the box David had thrown away was the game box, so I'm guessing he threw out the pizza base and a few more of the toppings but the game was actually complete.  It's a real pity as the chef cleaned up nicely (there was no point keeping the accessories without the game board) and it would have made a nice game to give to Emma's kids to keep them quiet for a while one afternoon that we went over there.  David denies getting rid of the box though, and says it was a "Shreddies box full of newspapers".  Okay... so where did the chef come from, and why did I think I saw a drawing of a pizza on the Shreddies box?

My first pony parcel arrived - the two G1s.  May I present to you...

Baby Splashes and Nectar!
I was so excited to get these two girls from Aqua.Sunlight on the Arena.  Not many more ponies to go to complete my US collection (excluding Mail Orders) now.

Later on, I was just browsing the internet when Mum made the most random comment.  "God, you have such long eyelashes.  I don't notice until you look down at the computer, but they look like those fake ones that they wear."  Well, excuse me, these are my own eyelashes!  I guess she figured out I was wearing mascara (the dreaded make-up which nobody should ever waste their money on) and thought she'd make me feel awkward by just saying enough?  Or perhaps she really thinks I am wearing fake lashes?!  I know I have got naturally long eyelashes - they're just blonde and don't show up too well - then when I wear mascara it kind of emphasises them and maybe does make them look fake.  She's not said anything since though, so whatever she thinks, at least she's not holding it against me anymore.

David went on a site visit in South London, mixing with yet more possible swine flu carriers.  Mum pointed out that another peak was coming up, and all he could say was "I know, I know!" in an exasperated tone.  Well, perhaps he should have got us out of here before he started work?  He had enough time to sort out all these stupid builders.

That night I went to Tesco, and David spent ages reading newspapers and looking for strawberry trifles he knew he wouldn't find, since a member of staff had told him they'd been discontinued the previous time we were there, again showing his told lack of concern for the swine flu virus while I am sleeping on the floor with all these congestion problems.

By the time we got back, Mum had settled herself down on the floor and was lying on top of my computer and tape recorder because I hadn't been there to move them out of the way.  She claimed that she "wanted to clear up so that I wouldn't climb over her" but she knows that the computer has to go on the sofa, so she must have known that I would have to climb over her anyway. >.<

I was extremely tired myself, but my allergies are just so awful.  I start sneezing as soon as I so much as sit on this floor.  I need to get out of here, but I just don't see any way that I can escape now that David's got a job and doesn't even have time to make any phone calls or try to move forward with Woodberry.

Sorry to end on a depressing note.  But that's another four days of my extremely fascinating life!  Now I must settle myself down on the floor of allergy-land and try to get some sleep.  Thanks for reading, everyone!

Desirée Skylark  xxx