Tuesday, 28 July 2015

Wishin' I Was Singin' In The Rain Instead Of Sufferin' With Broken Brackets!

February 6th 2012

The treacherous, slippery stage had arrived.  I didn't even dare to leave the house because the pavements looked lethal to my eyes!

I began wearing the orthodontic elastics again.  They were still dreadfully painful and made me speak with a horrible lisp but I was slowly getting used to them now.

Mum nervously rang the doctor again to find out about her "abnormal" blood test results.  It turned out that only her biochemical levels were "borderline abnormal" and the doctor had actually marked the papers as "no action required".  What a stupid receptionist to leave Mum worrying about her results all weekend when there was nothing wrong anyway.

However, they still wanted to send her for an endoscopy (which she still refused to have) which meant that she still believed that she had cancer.

David was unnecessarily nasty to her telling her that "swallowing a camera was the least of her worries" as she would also be swallowing a "cutter or blade" at the same time.  They'd "removed a polyp when he had it done".  Gee thanks, David.  That's a great way to encourage an already nervous patient to have the test done!

Mum refused to even speak to him when he came home from work that evening!  This caused him to go to sleep on the kitchen floor until she finally laid down on the family history room floor to go to sleep herself, so I didn't get to collect anything else from Grottsville.  I think I was the only one who wanted to get that house cleared.

February 7th 2012

I tried to sort through my MLP backcards but my terrible dust allergies were back with a vengeance.  Mum kindly helped me by going through them the first time and cleaning them off.  Everything from Grottsville was just so dusty and dirty, it was near impossible for me to sort through it all.

David took us to Ealing Broadway in his lunch hour and I went on another spending spree.  Gosh, where did I get my money from in those days?  I'd like to ask myself for advice!

I managed to embarrass myself in The Body Shop by knocking over a make up display with my enormous bag.  Well, maybe if the shop assistant hadn't kept pestering us, it wouldn't have happened.  It was quite clear that I knew exactly what I wanted to buy and had no intention of buying additional items, so why keep nagging me about their special offers?

The paths were still icy in places but I somehow made it home in one piece!

We went to Grottsville in the evening via Asda for 18 more blind bags.  Seriously, where was I getting all my money from?!  I know I intended on selling most of this pony stuff but I haven't even got the cash to buy things to sell these days!  I'm jealous of my past self!

Mum had another of her stomach pains but was still refusing to contemplate swallowing a camera to find out what was causing it.

February 8th 2012

We had a frightful day with a young man calling through the front door in a very posh voice.  It was nobody we knew and yet he kept coming back.  We didn't answer the door, of course, but he made me feel all jittery.

We went to see Singin' in the Rain at the Palace Theatre that evening.  I'd been looking forward to this for weeks and was determined to do everything I could to make myself feel good about my appearance.  Cue a long bath, dry hair shampooing my hair, wearing my new black butterfly dress and the my mum's pretty necklace that she had passed on to me the previous month.  But I still felt horrid...and still looked horrid too!

I think the dry hair shampoo made me look even worse actually!  White highlights are not my style!

I still got to the theatre in a terrible state of anxiety.  David had come in late at 6pm and there were terrible traffic jams all the way there so he ended up dumping us outside the theatre.  Mum panicked that we wouldn't be able to find him again and snapped at me for not bringing my phone with me, even though she was the one who'd advised me not to do so as I'd "only have to turn it off anyway".

Anyway, we did make it just in time and I started off really enjoying it.  Then I slowly sank into a depression, wishing that I'd had the opportunity to learn to sing and dance when I was still young enough to do so, and wondering if I ever could have made it if I'd come from that background.  Then  I observed David eyeing up the women in the show and remembered another reason that I'd always felt unable to follow my own dreams.

It was very good overall but some of the acting could have done with improvement and a couple of dancers were actually badly out of sync at one point!  The funniest bit was when the audience started complaining about getting wet.  Well, they chose to buy seats at the front of the stalls...what did they expect?!

February 9th 2012

Mum and I walked to the South Ealing charity shops and Lammas Park.  We saw redwings and a mistle thrush.  I took this photograph of the latter which must be the most beautiful photo of a mistle thrush that was ever taken, if I must say so myself!

(Yes, I am being sarcastic, in case you hadn't guessed!)

I was very depressed about my theatre dreams again following on from the previous evening.  Mum was angry with me as ever.  She was "too ill to take me going on and on" and apparently I "couldn't stop using the f word" (it had slipped out of my mouth in my frustration!)

My hair was bothering me again and I seemed to be gaining weight rather than losing it since we'd started doing all this extra walking!  I didn't dare to check the scales though.

David came in randomly at lunch time with a loaf of bread.  He hadn't told us that he was coming and hadn't asked if we wanted anything else at the shop.  In fact, if he'd come five minutes earlier, he would have walked into Mum changing her jumper!  After our complaints, he returned very briefly that evening to collect the shopping list.  So briefly, in fact, that he almost forgot to take the list!  "I'll be back as soon as I can," he lied, before dashing back to the office to "work" (and probably type up a list of all the women he'd seen at the theatre the night before).

It began to snow that evening and I couldn't say that I fancied the long walk to the orthodontist the following day!

February 10th 2012

Mum and I walked to Sparkle Dental Boutique where Saba fixed the bracket and told me not to worry about the one I'd swallowed as people swallow them "frequently". o_0  She started nosily interrogating me about my education again which stressed me out further and allowed her to avoid the actual topic of her job and my teeth.  I managed to quickly ask a couple of questions as she pushed me out of the door.  She told me the treatment would take at least another eight or nine months and this break had set me back as much as six or seven weeks.  Any further breakages could be expected to delay things by a similar period of time.  No wonder I was depressed!

But it all "depended what we wanted to do".  (More like what SHE wanted to do with my mouth!)  She had now decided that she wanted to bring my top front teeth back - which the old orthodontist had admitted couldn't be done without surgery - and move the bottom front teeth forward.  She took the elastics off all together so I needn't have suffered for the previous week.  My teeth weren't even hurting after this adjustment so I realised that no further progress would be made until the next appointment.

We had a walk around Boston Manor Park on the way back.  There were no ducks there again though and Mum and I both got scared of a "pitbull" (who turned out to be the most well behaved, sweetest little staffordshire bull terrier who even ignored the pigeons and the bread!)

I spent the evening in total depression about the orthodontic delays - wanting to study abroad and how I'd be too old to study musical theatre by the time the braces were off.  Mum got angry with me again, of course.  She knew I'd "want to give up because I only wanted the braces to impress a little..."  She trailed off and started screaming about how horrible I was to talk about wanting to leave. She would "never have spoken to her mum like that".  Well, normal people do grow up and leave home.  Sorry for the shock, mother.

I received a lovely parcel from my friend Louise.  Two little G4 Blind Bag ponies.  I didn't have Applejack or Rainbow Dash yet so I was thrilled to give them a place in my herd.

Best wishes,
Desirée  xxx

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